


The Perfect Victim

by cheesemonster



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, F/M, Original Character Death(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-08-07 05:03:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 12
Words: 39,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16401824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheesemonster/pseuds/cheesemonster
Summary: For Detective Carisi, it's not difficult to fall in love with a woman who he fought with. She is smart, brave and pretty. She seemed perfect. But it's not always easy to see someone's true colors. When the love of life turned into the archenemy, the only thing you can do is to defeat her. The Cop and the perpetrator, it’s their fate to meet each other.I revised this story and added some details.Now it is a completed story.





	1. the Perfect Witness

 

**[The Hospial of Hudson University]**

With a loud noisy of a sudden explosion, the window glass of the room was splitting everywhere. A young woman suddenly woke up. She felt a continuous pain from abdomen, which reminded her of a surgery several hours ago. The effect of anesthesia was reducing, she noticed the medical machines next to her bed were stopped, the broken glass was on the ground, and there were no doctors or nurses walking around.

What happened?

Before she could think this through, a man in a suit rushed into the room with a gun. He put the gun down as soon as he saw a young lady in front of him who apparently was a patient with I.V. He couldn't believe there was still a person left because all the people in the hospital of HU had already run or hidden.

“NYPD! I am detective Carisi!” Carisi walked quickly towards her, then knew why she was left--she looked like just waking up. She might pass out until the explosion. Carisi tried to help her stand up, said, “Miss, there were some crazy guys with guns in the hospital, you’d better to hide…”

Carisi broke off in the midsentence for someone shooting into the room. He pulled the woman down and covered her head.

“Well, well, well, the cop saved a lady.” A harsh and arrogant voice laughed loudly from beyond, “we’ll have a double kill.”

Carisi immediately realized that it’s extremely dangerous to leave the woman in the room, he made a risk decision, “Hey Miss, listen to me, you just seems to wake up, but now you are their target too, you have to go with me!”

The young woman’s lips were shaking, she felt more and more pains from abdomen. Carisi stood up and held his gun, meanwhile, grabbed her arm with the other hand. The young woman pushed his hand away, and pulled out the needle without hesitation, “Move, I’ll follow you!”

Carisi looked at her and nodded, then turned around and moved along the wall very carefully. They left the room and ran to next corner. Carisi tried to get to the top floor where the perpetrators held several doctors and nurses as hostages. But some of perpetrators blocked his way. Carisi pushed the woman to hide behind the metal closets as shelters, then leaned over the side of the closets to shoot. The bullets swooshed past them. At that moment, he felt a great strength knocked him onto the wall -- a bullet flied past where he just stood. Then Carisi found the woman grabbed his suit and pinned him against the wall, he took a deep breath, “Thank you.”

The woman released Carisi and leaned against the wall. She gasped and bent down, covering her abdomen by hands, but the blood was leaking through her fingers. Carisi pressed her wound and asked nervously, “Were you shot?”

“No, I just got a surgery. I think the suture was ruptured.” She smiles weakly, “You know there are more than one way in the hospital, right?” she was pointing to the door behind them.

The perpetrators were shooting, there was no time for thinking. Carisi helped her up and ran to the back door where there were stairs leading to other floors. Carisi climbed upstairs while listening to the noisy—the perpetrators were chasing them. “You go first,” He shoved her, “I’ll cover you!”

The woman tried her best to climb the stairs, she heard the gunshot and scream. She was frightened. Her legs couldn't help quivering. Her footsteps slowed down because the pain of the wound was growing in intensity. She leaned against the wall and felt the stairs seem endless. She thought she heard the hooter getting nearer and nearer, maybe the police is coming, but she did not know how long she could sustain.

Suddenly, an arm encircled her waist and helped her walk, “Let’s go!” The woman turned around to look up at Carisi and asked in a weak voice, “Are you all right?”

Before Carisi could answer, she had a strange feeling and couldn't help turning her head. A man with bleeding leg was holding a gun and trying to shoot Carisi. Then he pulled the trigger.

“No!” She screamed and pushed Carisi away.

The bullet shot through her side of the waist and brushed past Carisi’s thigh. She fell down and curled up on the ground. Carisi shot the man back, then bent down to put pressure on her wound, “No! No! No! Hang in there!”

All things were appeared as a blur in woman’s eyes. Her face was pale with exhaustion, she was trembling with cold. Carisi felt her warm blood was slowly gushing from underneath his hand. He knew she was losing conscious.

Carisi touched her face and said intensely, “hey, look at me, look at me! I still don’t know your name.”

“Evelyn.” She tried to reach out to hold Carisi’s hand.

Her hands were as cold as ice, Carisi’s heart started to twitch, but he had to steady himself and said, “Good, Eve, hold my hand.” He smoothed away the hair from her eyes, “Hang in there, Eve. Stay with me.”

Eve answered faintly, “Yes, detective.”

“Call me Sonny, hang in there! Eve! Stay with me!” Carisi said softly but firmly, “The police is coming! Stay with me!” At that time, he found his clothes and arms covered in her blood. He never felt so anxious that he had to beg for more time in his mind.

Then Carisi saw two perpetrators were approaching. He covered Eve and shot the men down. Although wearing the bullet-proof vest, two bullets were still painful enough to make Carisi nearly fall unconscious. The only thing Carisi could remembered before passing out was laying in blood with his hand on Evelyn’s wound, watching her pale face and mumbling, “Hang in there, Eve, stay with me…”

 

**[Mercy hosptial]**

As soon as Evelyn woke up, Lieutenant Benson and Fin came to the ward. They asked the details in the hospital and explained the attack in the Hospital of Hudson University.

Evelyn was very cooperative and tried to remember everything until the doctor told Benson that Evelyn really need a rest due to her two surgeries during past 24 hours. When Benson and Fin said sorry and decided to leave, they found Evelyn looked straight forward to the window, surprised but happy. She smiled and waved her hand. Both Benson and Fin turned to the window, Carisi was behind the window and looked at Evelyn with a smile.

Benson and Fin exchange glances, then came out. Carisi asked, “How is she? She still looked pale.”

“She got two surgeries and lost a lot of blood. The doctor said she still need to be monitored.” Fin smiled, “But she is young and has a good spirit, I think she will get well soon. Just relax.”

Carisi nodded and seemed cheerful, “She is very brave, isn't she?”

“Of course,” Benson smiled significantly to him, “How about you?”

Carisi touch his belly, and said, “I am fine, only some hairline fractures on bones and bruises on chest. The doctor said they will heal very quickly. But it really hurt than I thought. Did they catch those bad guys?”

“Two has escaped, they killed one students, one doctor and two guards, raped two nurses on the top floor.” Benson shook her head and sighed, “You did great to take Evelyn with you, otherwise…… what about the recent rape report of HU?”

“I just talked to the doctor in the hospital of HU, and you know what happened next,” Carisi answered, “I’ll keep following.”

Benson nodded and found that Carisi was looking at Evelyn with a worried frown on his face, then she said, “You know you both are witnesses, right? Besides, you are a cop and she is the key witness. You’d better not contact each other before trial.”

“I know, I know, I just want to know whether she’s OK,” Carisi walked away with Benson and Fin, then stopped curiously, “Wait, Lieu, Why do you say ‘contact each other’?”

“It’s normal that people have special feeling for those who saved their lives.” Benson explained, “Just don’t mess up at work.”

Fin continued, “We did a little background check. Do you know she has two master degrees and passed the bar exam? She’s also a PhD student of HU and a rising star in academic field. She works in a famous research lab and has a job to support her schooling. The professors, the employers, the colleagues, they all highly praise her. She has a great credibility, the jury will believe every word she says. Don’t screw up, Romeo.”

“Hey, she’s not my girlfriend,” Carisi disagreed, “I concerned her only because she was wounded," he added, "severely!”

“For saving your ass,” Fin held up two fingers, “Twice!”

“And I saved her life, too.”

Fin smiled with confidence, “We’ll see.”

 

**[///]**

Recently, A.D.A Peter Stone spent a lot of time in Mercy Hospital to assist other departments to investigate the attack. This time he stopped outside Evelyn’s ward, waiting for Dr. Wong to evaluate Evelyn’s mental condition before she left hospital.

A nurse carrying a file came by and said surprisingly, “Mr. Stone, I never realized you people need to question a witness for so many times.”

Stone felt a little embarrassed. Since he met Evelyn, he couldn’t help talking with her every time he came. She was undoubtedly brave and smart, sometimes adorable. But what the most attractive was her sparkling eyes with happiness when she talked about her research.

“Peter!” Evelyn found Stone entered.

“Hey,” Stone stood beside her and glanced at her laptop, “still working, huh?”

“Yes,” Evelyn seemed a little anxious, “I've stuck here for almost… like years, the project has already changed another guy in charge, but it’s very grateful that my colleagues send the latest files to help me speed up the work. And by the way--”

Evelyn said joyfully, “I will leave hospital in two days!”

“That’s why I came here,” Stone smiled, taking out a box of chocolate from his pocket, “For you. You said you like caramel.”

Stone watched her ripping the paper off, then said, “We invited a doctor to evaluate your mental condition to make sure you are qualified to be a witness.”

Evelyn held the chocolate with an unbelievable face, blinking, “I feel like a monkey tricked by chocolate to do experiment.”

Stone laughed, “You know the rules.”

“Yeah,” Evelyn answered, “what happened in the hospital will be considered as a trauma to me…”

Then they both heard someone’s calling out Stone’s name. Stone walked forward and made a small talk with the guy, then left.

Evelyn watched the guy coming up, then her smile was fading away.

The guy put down his suitcase and turned to Evelyn. He noticed a little fear and hostility flashed her eyes.

“Dr. Wong, I presumed.” It sounded Evelyn recognized him. She started smiling, “I’ve read your articles on the Journal of Behavior Science,” Her smile sweetened, “very impressive.”

“Thank you.” Answered Dr. Wong, politely, “Are you studying behavior science, too?”

“Kind of.” The answer made Dr. Wong feel uncomfortable.

“OK, let’s begin.”

 

**[///]**

“Is everything OK?” Stone asked as soon as Dr. Wong came out of ward.

Dr. Wong pondered a few seconds and then answered, “She will be perfect witness on the court. She knew exactly what to forget and what to remember,” He paused, “but too precisely to be natural, in my opinion. It’s just like…If she got answers in advance, she wouldn’t try to get 100 scores in the test, because she knew a few common mistakes will make her more credible.”

“What do you mean?”

“Either she is a master of disguise, or she is professional,”

“She is professional, you know that.”

Dr. Wong sighed, “Yes, I knew her background from Lieutenant Benson. She has master degrees in criminal justice and criminal behavior, passed the bar exam, and is reading PhD in neurocriminology. It is frontier science which is a great risky and aggressive choice. I’ve read her articles, insightful. I feel that she’s looking for something. But she obviously tried to conceal her professional training when I mentioned. She’s not a suspect, it’s weird.”

Stone looked worried, Dr. Wong tried to make him relax, “Maybe it’s just the professional sense to avoid exposing herself, that’s not uncommon. The shrinks are always sensitive to mental assessments. In most cases, psychological evaluation didn’t apply to the psychologists.” He recalled, “Before I came in, I watched for a while, I see why you like her…”

Before Stone began to explain, Dr. Wong continued, “Do not try to deny. She is pretty and smart, that’s attractive enough for most men. And it’s hard not to like her especially after knowing what she did in the attack. It’s human nature. Besides, she’s skillful at getting along with people. If she is a good guy, she will be perfect.”

“What do you mean ‘if she’s a good guy’, what if she’s a bad guy?”

“If she’s a good guy, she’s professional in criminology,” Dr. Wong looked at Evelyn through the window, “but if she’s a bad guy, she will be professional in crime. Considering what she’s studying, you must heard what Nietzsche said, ‘He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss,--”

“--the abyss also gazes into you.’” Stone looked at Evelyn and shook his head slightly, “She saved Carisi. How could she be a bad guy?”

“I hope not.” Dr. Wong answered.

 

**[///]**

On the day Evelyn left hospital, when Carisi showed up with a bunch of flowers and was followed by Amanda Rollins, Stone helped pack the baggage in the ward

“Wow, that’s really awkward,” Amanda whispered behind Carisi, “you don’t know Stone is here and also bring flowers? Is this the only way men can think of to please women?”

“Carisi, Rollins, good to see you,” Stone seemed surprised, “why are you two here? Evelyn didn't tell me you…”

“I’ve heard Eve leave hospital today, I thought she may need some help and I asked Rollins to do me a favor. So… where’s Eve?” Carisi felt unnecessary, looking around to find Evelyn.

“Wow, Eve, huh?” Amanda lowered her voice, “Carisi one, Stone zero.”

“I guess it’s legal for us to meet under the supervision of A.D.A.”

It’s Evelyn’s voice. 

Carisi turned around and saw Evelyn. She was coming in with some paper and looked pleasantly surprised, “Sonny! I thought I never see you again.”

Carisi looked at her with a delighted smile, “You look much better than the last time I saw you.”

“Oh, boy, last time she almost died.” Rollins rolled her eyeballs at Carisi. Then Carisi introduced Amanda to Evelyn.

“You bring me flowers,” Evelyn looked through Carisi’s embarrassment, and took the flowers with a sweet smile, “I love daisy, thank you.”

Carisi was relieved, “Good to know.”

Amanda winked at Carisi and murmured, “She’s good. I like her. And someone forgets to tell me she’s so pretty.” Then she had to walk out to answer the phone.

“Are we done with meet and greeting?” said Stone, “So Evelyn, you’ve finished all the hospital paperwork, right? And I get these two bags. We can go now.”

“OK.” Evelyn nodded.

When Stone reach out for the bags, Carisi grabbed one of them. Stone glanced at him and felt a little annoyed, but Carisi was totally distracted by the joy of reunion with Evelyn. He looked at her and his smile broadened, “How about a big dinner on the way home? You are too thin.” He felt he couldn't take his eyes off her. The girl who took the bullet for him, her pale face and cold hands he once touched were ingrained in his head. In these days, she was only in his dreams, covering in blood. But now, she was standing in front of him with energy. She could laugh, she could talk, and thank god she's still alive. Carisi stared at her and could not stop himself smiling.

Amanda rushed into room and said to him, “Lieutenant is calling us for emergency.”

“I got Evelyn,” answered Stone, immediately, “You guys go back to work.”

“I have Peter,” said Evelyn, “We can get together next time.”

Carisi looked at her with regret, “I am sorry, Eve, I…” After all those difficult moments they been through together on that day, He couldn’t even find an opportunity to have a word with her. The only thing he could do is just standing behind the window and hoping she’s fine. He comforted and encouraged so many victims in SVU, but left her alone in fear for so long. Carisi opened his arms, however, seemed hesitated to embrace Evelyn since he couldn’t make sure how she felt.

However, Evelyn stepped forward, then tiptoed to give him a big hug, “Thank you for saving my life, Sonny.”

“Me too.” Carisi’s heart was melting with joy, his voice was tender, and he held her arms gently, “I am really sorry, Eve, we always meet each other in chaos, I wish I had more time to know you.”

“We all will.”

 

**[On the Court]**

The trial became a disaster when Evelyn was questioned by the defense lawyer who tried to deny her credibility. The reason was obvious--she just woke up from coma when the attack happened, it was intense enough to confuse her feelings and memory because of the pain of surgery and gunshot.

The defense lawyer pressed her so hard that Evelyn could not speak any word in the witness box. She seemed terrified and turned to the jury with a helpless look. She didn’t try to argue with the defense lawyer, the silence and the pitiful face implied that how innocent and frightened she was.

It worked.

At first, Stone worried if she fought with the defense lawyer, she might say something wrong or confuse something. The silence was absolutely the best strategy. She knew it and she did. She was much cooler than she looked like. Now he found that the jury showed their sympathy to Evelyn and the fierce defense lawyer was becoming a ruthless monster.

“Your honor?” Evelyn sounded frightened but firmly, “I am a witness and also a victim. Please allow me to ……”

“Yes.”

Evelyn’s voice was faltered, her eyes were wet with tears. She described the essential details which can be easily proved by the safety cameras in the hospital and roughly recalled the confused time and events which could be questioned.

The jury listened very carefully. It’s a reliable testimony that there were not too many details for a patient to remember.

“A few common mistakes will make her more credible.” Dr. Wong’s word was arise in Stone’s mind.

The defense lawyer asked, “Can you describe the details when you and the detective hide behind the closets? And when were your suture ruptured?”

If the jury believed what she said, they would tend to believe what she says next.

“I can’t remember where we were, the detective pushed me behind the closets. I just heard…emmm…four gunshots, I guess?” Evelyn thought for a while, “Then I found a man was targeting the detective across the hallway, so I pulled the detective back, I guess that’s when my suture ruptured.”

Before the defense lawyer objected, Stone stood up, “For the record, your honor, the investigation said that number of the bullet holes on the closets remained the same as what witness said.” Since we were on the same side, I’ll give you a hand, Stone sighed to himself. Evelyn consciously or unconsciously confused the time of gunshot and the ruptured suture to make her look clear when the attack happened, which gave a reasonable and legal excuse for Carisi to shoot back. Stone remind what Carisi said in the witness box, “It happened too fast, at that time I was too nervous to remember the details, all I can heard was the gunshot, and when I noticed, she was bleeding.” Stone knew it’s a huge risk to describe the details in that way, not only she knew what and how to say to jury, but also had an accurate prediction about Carisi’s testimony on the court.

Evelyn showed the wound to the jury. The scar was shocking. Her tears was falling, “The detective even used his body to cover me when ruffians came to shot. If the police couldn’t arrive in time, I can’t imagine… me, the detective, we both would die. There are already many people of my school died and assaulted in this attack. I am here to testify what happened in the hospital and bring evil to justice, not to set the innocent people up.”

Impressive speech, the jury were touched. Stone narrowed his eyes, he watched Evelyn, wondering what kind of people he’s coping with.

The trial finally finished. Stone won as the extent as the chief of DA Office expected. He turned around when people dismissed. No Evelyn. He felt he should say something to her. When he walked out of the court and took out the phone, he found Evelyn was sitting on the steps of the courtyard, alone.

“Anything need to tell me?” Stone sat down next to her. 

Evelyn sighed, “People like us, we always know ethics of justice and legal justice are not the same thing, right?”

Stone silenced for a while, “Yes.” At that moment, he no longer need Evelyn to explain. That’s the explanation he want to know. 

“Listen,” Stone touched her shoulder gently, “if you need any help, I am here, anytime.” 

“Thank you, Peter, I’m so lucky to have you. But I think I should go,” Evelyn stood up, “there is memorial ceremony for the victims in school, I should go to mourn.”

“Hey, Eve,” Stone caught up Evelyn, “I know it is not a good timing, but there is always no good timing.” he hesitated, then said, “Would you like to have a dinner with me tonight? And if you ask, yes, it’s a date.”

An awkward silence. Stone found it’s much easier to wait for the decision from the jury.

“I am sorry, I promised someone else.”

“I understand.” Stone was disappointed but smiled, “may I ask who?”

“Someone you know, Detective Carisi.”

It’s a matter of course, wasn’t it? Stone laughed at himself.

 

**[Evenlyn's apartment]**

Carisi and Evelyn stopped at the door of Evelyn’s apartment. Everything went well. They hung out several times, cooked together, called and texted each other every day. In Carisi’s eyes, Evelyn was a sweet woman. She never complain about the random calls from his work, in fact, she was eager to know his “adventurous and dangerous” job. Sometimes, he felt he talked about himself too much. But Evelyn seemed very interested in everything about him, his work, his childhood, his family, his grumble, his happiness and his sadness. The truth was he enjoyed time with Evelyn, he always felt comfortable with her. And he loved to see the light in Evelyn’s eyes when she watched him speaking.

“I have a strange feeling…when I talk about myself, maybe you treat me like an experimental subject.” Carisi sounded seriously but couldn’t help laughing.

Evelyn protested, “No way!”

Carisi held her in arms, “To be clear, the dinner on the court day was ‘you saved my life, I bought you a dinner’, but the rest are official date, you and me. Are we on the same page?”

Evelyn nodded.

He kissed on her forehead and looked at her eyes, "Do you know when you were in hospital, I prayed for you in church for many times. I always dreamt that you were lying in blood. Those days are nightmares. I am so grateful that you are in good health.”

“Sonny, you are traumatized.” Evelyn cupped his face and looked at him, frowning.

“A little, I guess,” Carisi rested his forehead against hers, said, “I can’t imagine if you couldn’t make it, I…”

“No, Sonny, listen to me. I am right here in front of your eyes. I am fine. You saved my life.” Evelyn said affirmatively, then she raised her head to kiss Carisi’s forehead, "Why didn't you tell me before?"

Carisi seemed a little shy, "I did't mention before because I don't want to scare you, like wow what a crazy Catholic guy. We were just in the hospital for like 20 minutes and he prayed to God?" Carisi's said importantly, "But Eve, when I prayed for you, I never thought that God would bring you to me. I never had the feeling that I've already known you…like for my whole life."

Evelyn touched his face and kissed him on his cheek, said gently, "Thank you, Sonny."

Carisi held tightly to her and kissed her from neck to collarbone. He noticed that Evelyn was a little stiff in his arms.

He watched her and said gently, "Hey, what's matter, baby? If you don't... are you scared?"

Evelyn shook her head sharply, "No! No! I just..."

"A little shy? Don't be, my sweetie," There was a thought flashing through Carisi’s mind, but he missed. “Come on, baby girl, give me a kiss.” He stared at her with loving eyes, then leaned towards and tried to kiss her on the lips. But Evelyn seemed a little reluctant and hesitated, her lips touch on Carisi’s a few times. Then Carisi stopped. Evelyn bowed her head and looked guilty. Carisi said concernedly, “hey, don’t. If you want to take it slow, I’m OK with it, REALLY. Just make sure you feel comfortable, OK? Actually, I concerned your wound more than…you know.” Carisi smiled softly, “besides, a gentleman always has patience.”

“I am sorry, Sonny.” Evelyn’s looked at his eyes.

“You are so sweet when you call me Sonny.” Carisi cupped her face and kissed her on her forehead. He turned around and ready to leave.

“Sonny!” Evelyn ran to Carisi and gave a good-bye kiss on his cheek.

“Wow, I am flattered,” Carisi said gently, “Good night, baby, sleep tight.”


	2. The explosion

**[Bar]**

The bar near HU held a special night for guests. Many people came here as well as Stone. He hooked up with a girl at the bar counter in less than five minutes after he came in. They drank, talked and laughed. Then the girl touched his arms and smiled, “Tell me more about you.”

Stone leaned towards to her and stroke her bare leg, “How about…”

He stopped in the midsentence when a waitress wearing bunny dress passed by. He called her name, “Evelyn?”

The waitress stopped and turned around, surprised then smiled, “Peter!”

Stone took his hand off the girl’s leg, feeling a little embarrassed.

Evelyn stepped forward, glanced at the girl and smirked, “Wow, who is this?”

“She is…emmm…” Stone hesitated, “What are you doing here?”

The girl rolled her eyeballs and left.

“Sorry,” Evelyn raised her eyebrows and shrugged, “The boss of the bar is an older student in our lab, he need some help tonight, so he called girls in the lab, and here we are.”

“Yep, it’s me.” The bartender came to say, “My girls can keep all tips and I will pay three times hourly wage. I am generous, right?”

“We know you are a GOOD boss.” Answered Evelyn, laughed.

“You bet!” said the bartender, “Much better than our GREAT Professor Mincoff.”

“Shut up!”

“Evelyn used to cover me in the lab,” the bartender reached out one hand to shake with Stone.

“Used to?”

“Yep, I quitted from the lab and open this bar. Now I am happy and free.” 

Evelyn handed a glass of wine to Stone, smiling, “Drinks on me.” Then she walked away with wine and beverage. 

Stone followed her to every table she served, trying to have a talk with her. Evelyn turned around and confused, “Why do you keep explaining what you did with that girl?”

Before he answered, a guy tried to touch the tail on her short skirt. Stone stepped forward and grabbed the guy’s arm, said furiously, “Get your hand off her!”

“Hey, hey, Peter, calm down, OK? I can handle this.” Evelyn separated Stone and the guy, then said to the guy, softly, “Look at this curious cat. If you dare to touch me, I happen to have some neurotoxin without antidote. I don’t mind to add it in your wine as extra free. Then I will drag you to the closet, you can’t move, you can’t scream and you’ll die and decompose in silence. How about that?” She patted the guy’s back.

“Please don’t do that.” The guy hung his head.

“Good boy.” Evelyn turned to Stone, “Now, it’s your turn. God, you guys are such a baby. Peter, you don’t need to explain anything to me. You are single, you can hook up with any girl you are interested in. I am not your girlfriend. I really don’t care what you do. Tonight is a good timing. So many beautiful girls, just talk to them and buy them a drink. I believe you can get what you want. And you are handsome, you don’t even…”

“I’m not handsome enough for you, am I?” asked Stone, staring at her face, “You know my feelings for you.”

“Peter…please…” Evelyn shook her head and walked to the bar counter. 

“Could we have a talk?”

“I am working.” Evelyn refilled the mugs, “The boss is here.”

Stone turned to the bartender, “Hey, I need to borrow this girl for a few minutes.”

“You what?” The bartender narrowed his eyes, he noticed Stone badgered Evelyn for the whole night, “Sorry, man, busy night.” Then he gestured Evelyn to serve tables.

Stone held Evelyn’s wrist, taking out money from wallet, “Two hundred dollars for her twenty minutes.”

“What am I? A hooker?” Evelyn tried to get rid of his hand.

“Hey, get your hand off her, OK?” said the bartender, he walked out of the counter and tried to calm Stone down, “You can talk to her right here.”

“No. I…”

“Peter, if you want to talk, let’s go outside.” Evelyn said to him. 

The bartender came to Evelyn and whispered, “If you don’t want to, I can help you to…”

“It’s OK,” answered Evelyn, “He is a friend.”

The bartender nodded, then got the money Stone put on the counter and shook his head, “Two hundred bucks for a Mincoff’s PhD student? I lost money.” Then he smirked to Evelyn, “And I don’t think he can do you for twenty minutes.”

“I can fuck her all night!” Stone gazed at him.

“For God sake, gross. Can you two just shut up? You! Come out with me.” Evelyn pushed Stone to the door, then grabbed the money from the bartender, staring at him, “You are not a pimp.” Then she put the money back to Stone’s pocket.

As the door closed behind them, the world suddenly became quiet. Evelyn let out a long breath and turned to Stone, smiling. Stone leaned toward to her and tried to kiss her. She ducked as Stone hold her.

“Is that a hickey?” Stone gazed into Evelyn’s low-cut shirt, and a small fuchsia bruise was showing on her chest. Stone got jealous, “You sleep with him, huh? For how long? Now what are you? Boyfriend or girlfriend? Or just friends with benefit?”

Evelyn pulled the collar up to cover the hickey and said, “Peter…don’t…Sonny is my boyfriend.”

“BOYFRIEND? He loves to fuck his girlfriend hard, doesn’t he? Do you like it?” Stone got close and made her back to a corner. He reached out his hand to touch Evelyn’s face, “I can do better than him. I can fuck you to come every time.”

“Hey! Stone!” Evelyn watched him with rage, “You are not drunk, show some respect!”

Stone hung his head, stepped backward and took a deep breath, “I am sorry.”

“What’s wrong with you?” Evelyn frowned.

“I…I…”

Evelyn sighed, then said, “Hey, Peter, it’s OK.” She held his arm and walked to the banisters, “How long have you done…emmm…”

Stone looked at her, waiting for her question.

“With the girls?”

“Girl-S,” Stone surprised, “How do you know?”

Evelyn smiled lightly, “Based on your skillful ‘hookup’, I guess you’ve had many girls. And you said ‘feelings for me’ after you took your hand off a girl’s leg for like five minutes? That’s…”

“Stupid,” Stone shook his head, “I know. You know what? Sometimes, I am madly jealous of Carisi…he has a big family, they love each other. He loves his job. It’s OK, it’s normal. But now, he gets you and you happen to love each other? I shouldn’t ask ‘why him’. But I just wonder ‘why not me?’ I guess I did something wrong. Or is this some Matthew Effect? ”

“There is no logic in love.” Evelyn stared at his eyes, said softly, “Peter, you are not as terrible as you think. We all need time and find a way to recover. You just chose your own way.”

“Carisi told you.” Stone’s eyes was mild pale.

Evelyn nodded.

Stone said with backlash, “Don’t try to pity me or comfort me…I don’t need…”

“People always say ‘I feel the same way’,” Evelyn looked up at the dark sky, “Guess what, there is no such thing.”

Stone looked at her, solicitously, “You have a story.”

Evelyn took off the bunny ears from her head, her thick hair fell over her shoulders, “Do you know parallel universe?” Her eyes gazed into Stone, shinning in the dark night, “the universe is as the same as ours but slightly different. Like…you might be a cop and I might be a bartender. There are numerous universes, I believe there is the one that people we love would be together with us and get happiness in the end. It sounds absurd. But every time when I think all I lost would be found in another universe and another me would get completed, the regrets…” She sighed and sunk into silence.

The giant buildings stood beneath a deep-blue sky, the streets were deserted. Evelyn shook her hair and said in a low voice, “This city is too noisy, you can’t hear people’s whisper.” Her hair was blowing very slightly in the breeze. Stone could smell a subtle fragrance of tangerine from her hair. He didn’t speak. The cool air blow across the street in the middle-night, Stone leaned against her and closed his eyes, enjoying the still moment which belonged to their own. He never felt so peaceful and relaxed.

 

**[Stone's house]**

“Wake up, sleeping beauty, you've arrived home.”

Stone woke up in the passage seat and looked around in a kind of mist. Evelyn drove him home using his car. She got off the car and covered up Stone with a blanket, smiling, “I found this in your truck. Don’t catch a cold.”

Stone walked to the door, then turned around and found Evelyn didn't follow him. She was standing at the end of the stairs and ready to leave. Stone ran to her, said urgently, “Eve, don’t…” He begged, walking close to her and trying to touch her face, yet not touch for respect and care. He looked down at her eyes, imploring her, “Stay…please.”

She watched him for a while with tender eyes. The light of road lamps was through the luxuriant leaves of the tree, the small specks of light were dancing in her eyes. Then she answered firmly, “I am sorry, Peter. I can’t.”

Stone’s heart sunk down, he bowed his head and closed his eyes.

“Go home, you need a good rest, not me.” Evelyn patted his shoulder, then left away.

With a few steps, she heard Stone calling her name. She turned her head, found Stone standing behind her with eyes full of regret. Then he asked, “In the parallel universe, if we meet first, will you be with me?”

Gazing into his face for a little while, Evelyn nodded, “I would love to, Peter.”

Stone smiled bitterly, “I guess it’s important for everyone to show up at the right time.”

“Good night, Mr. Stone.”

 

**[///]**

Evelyn wandered on the street, watching her own shadow keeping on from longer to shorter and vice versa. Then she heard car honking. She looked up and found it was Carisi’s truck. The car stopped. Carisi got off the car and leaned against car door, smiling, “hey, Miss bunny, need a ride?”

Carisi went forward and covered Evelyn with his coat, “You may get a cold.” He opened the door for her, then sat back in the car, handing some soup to her and kissing her on her temple, “Much better, huh?”

“I thought you are on call tonight.”

“Fin owes me one, so…” answered Carisi, watching her meaningfully, “Anyway, my girl need me tonight.”

Evelyn felt happy but confused, “How do you know I am here? I told you I was in the bar …” Then she found her bunny ears were on the central panel, “Oh…”

“Yeah, I saw everything.” Carisi shook his head, “I went to the bar and saw you and Stone…until now. I have to admit it’s a real torture for me.”

“I am sorry, Sonny.” Evelyn looked very guilty.

“No, you don’t need apologize to me. Even you are my girlfriend, you can break up with me for anyone you love.” Carisi felt painful and angry, “I just can’t believe…Do you know I waited for the whole night to see whether you are willing to go with him or not. It’s…it’s like an execution to me…” Carisi’s became upset, “God, you don’t know how I’ve been through this night…I don’t know if you went into his house, what am I gonna--”

“Sonny! Sonny! Baby, listen to me,” Evelyn leaned towards to him and cupped his face, then gave him a long deep kiss. Finally, Carisi calmed down. He rested his head on her shoulder and closed his eyes, sighing quietly. 

Evelyn stroke his hair, “Feeling better? I won’t go with anyone except you. You saw everything, now you know my decision.”

“I worried for the whole night that you might say yes to him.” Carisi murmured, smelling the familiar faint scent of tangerine on her neck and kissing her jaw, “I love you, Eve. Don’t leave me.”

“I am all yours.” answered Evelyn, in a tender voice. She turned her head and watched close to Carisi, keeping pressing small but gently kisses on his cheek and nose.

Her words and kisses made Carisi’s envious heart have peace at last. Then Carisi started the engine and smiled, “Actually, I respect all you did for Stone. He is lucky to have you as a friend.”

Evelyn sighed, “Sonny, you don’t have to…”

“No, No, Let me finish this,” Carisi raised his eyebrows and said proudly, “But I am so lucky to have you as my love.”

“Me too, baby.” Answered Evelyn, softly.

 

**[NYPD Office]**

“Sonny!”

When Evelyn came in, the squad were talking about case. Hearing Evelyn’s voice, Carisi turned around and said delightedly, “Here’s my girl!”

He gave Evelyn a hug and kissed on her forehead, then turned to the squad, “hey, guys, this is Evelyn, she’s my ….”

“Don’t show off!” Rollins cut in, “we all know her. We just want to know who the lucky guy is.”

Evelyn said hi to everyone, “Sonny is my boyfriend.” Then she turned to Carisi, “You said there is some…”

“Right, right,” Carisi took out some blanks from the draw and grabbed a chair for her, “Take a sit and fill the blanks. It’s a big case, so there is a lot of follow-up work. Don’t be nervous, just some paperwork…questionnaires...no big deal.” He kissed on top of her head and stood beside her.

“Finally!” Fin looked at them and turned to Amanda, “Hey Rollins, you owe me 10 bucks.”

Carisi watched Amanda passed 10-dollor notes to Fin, “Seriously, guys? What’s your bet? ‘Together or not’?”

“No,” Rollins looked around and lowered her voice, “it’s ‘Stone or Carisi’, and I thought she would have a better taste.”

“Why do I bother?” Carisi shook his head lightly, then walked to the vending machine.

When Evelyn filled the blanks, Stone came out from Benson’s office. He saw Evelyn was writing at Carisi’s desk. He stopped in the front of the door and watched her. Fin went to him and got him a cup of coffee, “When will you give up on her?”

“Is that so noticeable?” Stone looked away.

“Although my boy loves a guy, I do know the look when people love someone. You, my son, and Carisi, you have the similar face when you see someone you love. From that face, I can tell you still have feeling for her.”

Stone looked at Carisi gave Evelyn a diet coke and some snacks, bent down and kissed her. He answered peacefully, “They were under extreme circumstances, they trusted each other, they counted on each other, they protected and saved each other, they have special bond.”

“Fair enough.” Fin showed a little sympathy, “Why don’t go to say hi to her? I am sure even as a friend she is great.”

Stone drank the coffee and said, “I know her, we are good.” Then, He walked away.

Evelyn put the pen down and held the paper, “Nailed it!”

Carisi check the blanks. Evelyn stood up and picked up her bag, “It’s a little late, I must go. Remembered the academic conference I mentioned to you? The opening ceremony is in this afternoon. I worked this for days, I hope nothing goes wrong. Besides, I just got email from my professor, he told me that I will replace Heather to give a presentation in the conference and it’s kind of big deal. I am so excited!”

“Wow,” Carisi embraced her, “I am so proud of you, Einstein.”

Evelyn put on her coat, “And also, my professor asked me to send flowers to Hugo Harrison’s room, you know him, the Massive Biology’s CEO, BEFORE ceremony.” Evelyn rolled her eyeballs, “Control freak.”

Carisi pouted, “The man you told me? Your professor’s BFF? They are really annoying, aren’t they?”

“Watch your tongue, they are my boss.” Evelyn laughed.

“OK, house elf,” Carisi kissed her, then putting the snacks in her pocket, “How about…I pick you up after the conference, buy some food and cook your favorite dinner at my place?”

“You are the best.” Evelyn kissed him, grabbing the coke and rushed to the door. 

“Break a leg!” Carisi raised his voice. “Hey, be safe, conference where?” 

“The Green Grand Hotel.”

 

**[///]**

After about two hours work, the squad were distracted by the breaking news on TV. It was reporting an explosion occurred fifteen minutes ago. In the screen, people cried, screamed and ran over. The squad saw the police were pouring out of building.

Carisi surprisingly found a billboard behind the news reporter, which could been recognized several words, “THE INTERNATIONAL…… CONFERENCE…” He had a bad feeling and began to call Evelyn.

It’s voice mail. He dialed again and again, muttering to himself, “Come on, Eve, pick up the phone!”

Then, they heard the reporter said, “…the explosion happened on the 13th floor of the Green Grand Hotel…”

Carisi, Fin and Rollins exchanged a shocking look and remembered the conference location Evelyn mentioned when she left.

Carisi turned around and ran out.

Benson looked at him, curiously. Meanwhile, Rollins’s phone was ringing. 

Fin grabbed his car key, “Evelyn is in the hotel.” 

“Oh my God!” Benson stood up and ready to go.

Before she took actions, Rollins hung up the phone with an unbelievable face, “Lieutenant, there is a rape claim in the Green Grand Hotel.”

 

**[Mercy Hospital]**

All the wounded in the Green Grand Hotel were sent to Mercy Hospital. After Benson and Rollins investigated the rape victim in Hotel. They went to see Evelyn in another room. Carisi came out and looked very upset.

“How is Evelyn?” asked Benson in a concerned voice.

Carisi worried, “She’s awake. The doctor said she’s very close to the explosion. Broke an arm, concussion, maybe.”

The squad sighed of relief. Carisi felt so guilty, “I can’t believe I saved her in the hospital attack but almost lost her in the explosion. See her laying there, it breaks my heart.”

“It’s not your fault.” Benson patted his shoulder, “No one knows what would happen.”

Rollins added, “The most important is she is alive. Don’t blame yourself. Take care of her.”

As soon as the nurse carried Evelyn in a wheelchair out of the ward for brain scan, Carisi took over Evelyn. Staring at her with a worried face, Carisi bent down and asked gently, “How do you feel, baby?” He reached out his hand to touch wounds on her face and wanted to kiss her. But the nurse stopped him and gave him some tips for brain scan. Then Carisi carried her to check and Rollins followed them to offer some help.

When they passed through the hallway. Evelyn glanced at the wards. She seemed recognized a woman lying on bed. They stopped, Rollins asked Evelyn, “You know her?”

“She’s Heather.” Evelyn answered, “We both are Professor Mincoff’s students. Is she injury, too?”

Carisi remembered, “The Heather? You replaced her to give presentation?”

“Yes. But she shouldn’t be here. Professor Mincoff said she wouldn’t come to the conference, she had some important issues to handle with.”

Rollins’s face became twisted.

When Evelyn entered into the scanning room, Carisi asked, “What was that?”

“Heather Brown,” answered Ronllins, “She is our victim. She claimed Professor Mincoff raped her in the Green Grand Hotel.”

“What? When?” Carisi can’t believe his ears.

“Just before the explosion happened. And Mincoff was died in the explosion.”

 

**[NYPD Office]**

Carisi walked quickly into the squad room, seemed a little exhausted, “Hey, Rollins, Have you got rape kit?”

“What’s the matter?” Rollins looked at his face, handing the report to him, “You looked tired. Is Evelyn OK?”

“Not good, she got a high fever last night, I am in the hospital for the whole night.” Carisi frowned heavily, “I never thought that those awful things would happen to her again.”

“Hey, Carisi,” said Rollins, “If you need any help, I can...”

“Thank you, Amanda,” Carisi shook his head, “But I won’t relieve unless I stay with her. I know I am overprotective, but I should.” He took a deep breath, then opened the report and watched for a while, “Huh, there are two men’s DNA? That’s weird, Heather only mentioned one person. One DNA belongs to Alexander Mincoff, the other belongs to…unidentified.”

Rollins continued, “We also found four persons’ fingerprints in the room. Guess which four?”

“That many?” Carisi he merely shrugged, “the victim, Mincoff, who else?”

“Hugo Harrison, the CEO of Massive Biology,” Rollins raised her eyebrow, “and the last one is your little Eve.”

Carisi denied without thinking, “That’s impossible.”

“Actually, it’s possible, but your girl stayed in that room for less than five minutes. So, Carisi, you are right to trust her.” Benson waved at Carisi and Rollins, “Come here, watch the videos. CSU gave us the videos of safety cameras in the hotel. They showed Evelyn sent flowers to the room then left. After half an hour, Harrison and Heather entered the room. The screen time shows about twenty minutes later, Mincoff went in. They didn’t come out until…the explosion.”

The video showed that several minutes before the explosion, Professor Mincoff came out of the room, he staggered along the hallway and his clothes half buttoned. He looked like dizzy and tried to walk. At that time, Evelyn showed up, she held Mincoff walking a few steps to the opposite direction of the safety camera. Then Mincoff crouched on the ground. Evelyn went down. It looked like they were talking. Her back is to the camera and covered Mincoff. Several seconds later, Evelyn stood up and stepped back. She turned around and looked very panic. Mincoff struggled to stand up. Evelyn screamed and ran away. Then Mincoff was blow. The video stopped.

“Obviously, Evelyn found the bomb in Mincoff’s clothes, so she ran away. But who set off the bomb?” asked Fin.

“We don’t know.” Rollins answered, “There is only one safety camera in this direction. Both Evelyn and Mincoff had a distance from the camera. We can’t see. And the way Mincoff walked, he seemed to be drugged. There must be something happened in that room. It’s highly possible that he was drugged and set off a bomb.”

“We never know. CSU said, according to the damages in the hotel, the bomb must be repacked to reduce the destructive force, which means the explosion had the specific target. That’s why Evelyn was lucky enough to go back alive.” Fin added, “Since Mincoff became suicide bomber, maybe he was the target.”

“Wow, he was legendary.” Said Rollins, looking at the laptop, “I found the news said he was shot on the shoulder by his student in HU campus five years ago, the murderer then jumped from the building of Massive Biology. Our professor wasn’t lucky enough this time.”

“Sounds like more than one student want him dead,” Carisi nodded, “So, We know Heather called the police, Mincoff died, and where is Harrison?”

“The camera in the ground floor showed that he slipped away after the explosion.” Said Rollins.

Fin shook his head, “Believe it or not, Harrison? My instinct tells me he must involve in.”

Benson answered, “But it doesn’t make sense that Heather called the police after killing Mincoff. Besides, the victim didn’t claim Harrison. Even the second DNA sample belongs to him, it didn’t mean rape. Heather is an adult. Maybe she and Harrison just had sex, but Mincoff went in and raped her.”

“Wait, Lieu,” Carisi said, “Here are two points in the case. First, we don’t know the causal link between the explosion and the rape. Who set off the bomb? Considering the shot case in HU Rollins just mentioned, it’s not the first time the students want to kill Mincoff, Heather had enough reason to hate him. Second, as the video shows, these three stayed in the same room until the explosion happened, which means Harrison saw the rape in that room but he didn’t call the police. Here’s is theory -- Heather had the motive to kill Mincoff, and Harrison was the witness.”

“Good call!” Benson nodded, “Now, we can call Heather and Harrison. And Evelyn too. We must know what she saw or heard.” As the squad went out the room, Benson stopped Carisi, “I know you want to protect Evelyn from these things. She has been through too much recently, but…”

Before she finished, Carisi answered, “That’s for work. I understand. She’s strong, and I trust my guys, they will manage well. I’ll go for Harrison.”

“Thank you, Carisi.”

 

**[Country Club]**

When Rollins and Carisi asked what happened in the room on that day. Harrison was playing golf with his wife in the country club. He repeated that they just talked about the academic issues in the room. He didn’t know anything between Heather and Professor Mincoff. He emphasized that even as a friend, he had no duty to know everything about Professor Mincoff.

“But I heard you two are best friends. ‘Bestie’? I guess.” Said Carisi, ironically, “and your company cooperated with Mincoff’s team in most research. You even build a lab for him. What’s the name of the lab? Let me see, Mincoff’s Bio-Lab.”

“Impressive! Detective.” Harrison looked up and watched Carisi, “You know, as the CEO of a big company, we will provide the most advanced equipment for the most talented brains as long as their idea can bring excellent profits to us. It’s not about friendship, but about benefits.”

“Save your brag, Mr. Big.” Rollins rolled her eyeballs, “since you have so much passion in research, can you tell us how your passion went into Heather’s vagina?”

“What are you talking about?” Harrison was irritated.

“Hello?” Carisi raised his eyebrows, “We are in 21th century, we do have a thing called safety camera, OK?”

Harrison’s face became black, “You are bluffing! You don’t have warrant for my DNA.”

Carisi found Harrison’s wife was waving hand to her husband in a distance. He looked at Harrison, smiled, “Well, No. But people like you, will lose a great property when you divorce, right?”

“What do you want?” Harrison’s voice was full of rage.

Carisi continued, “Heather Brown claimed Alexander Mincoff raped her in the Grand Green Hotel, the video showed when the rape happened, you were there. Either you let the rape happen, or you committed rape." 

As Harrison started to open his mouth, Carisi shushed him, “and then Mincoff was killed by a bomb as soon as he came out of the room. Either you conspired to explode with Heather, or you let the explosion happen. Which one?”

Harrison breathed heavily, he lowered his voice, “We don’t need to do this. That woman tempted me and had sex with me, but Mincoff was the one who raped her. OK?”

“So you just stood there to see Mincoff raping Heather, but told us you talked about academic issues all the time?” Carisi took out the handcuff, “Hugo Harrison, you are under arrest.”

“For what?”

“Obstruction of justice, and it’s a federal felony!”

 

**[Mercy Hospital]**

Benson and Fin didn’t get too much information after talking with Evelyn. The reason she was in hallway was simple. As one of the conference organizer, she should know the locations of the important guests. She intended to find Harrison, but met Mincoff in the hallway who seemed breathless. As his student, of course, she wanted to help him. She unfastened his clothes and that’s how she found the bomb.

Fin drove the car, “Is there any possible that Evelyn set off the bomb? I mean we only can see her back in the video, nobody knew what she did.”

Benson surprised, “Come on, Fin, I think you like her.”

“I do,” Fin answered, “but it doesn’t mean I should trust her unconditionally. That’s Carisi’s job.”

Benson disagreed, “She almost killed by the bomb. And she doesn’t have the motive. Why did she want to blow her professor?”

Fin smiled, “the professors, the students, we all know how twisted their relationship can be. Remembered the guy jumped from the building, he shot Mincoff, but failed. Evelyn complained Mincoff, we all heard, in our office.”

“You guys also complained me!” Benson raised her eyebrows.

“No!”

“Behind my back!”

“Yeah…That…”

Benson laughed, “See, it’s normal that people complain. And don’t tell Carisi what you think.”

“I am old, not crazy, Mama.” Answered Fin.


	3. the explosion II

**[Interrogation Room, NYPD]**

The talk with Heather was even worse. She insisted that she had nothing to do with Mincoff’s death. And she had an affair with Harrison. Heather cried, “I am the victim, why do you interrogate me?”

“But Harrison was in the room when the rape happened.”

Heather’s tears was falling. Benson asked in a concerned voice, “Did he help you? Or he just watched? It must be very sad and humiliated when all these happened.”

Heather cried with a sob of despair, “I didn’t want to…”

Fin and Benson exchange glances. Benson continued, “It’s not your fault, Heather, just tell us what happened in the room. We can help you. The pains, the lies, the love, they deserve a closure.”

Heather shook her head and shouted, “NO! You don’t understand! It’s not about love! IT’S NOT LOVE! It’s just…” She began to pull her own hair.

Benson aggravated her tone, “Just what, Heather? Someone you thought he loved you, but watched you raped by another man. The man you want to protect insisted that you are the one who tempted him. Really Heather? If it’s not about love, what’s it about? Is there anything worth than your dignity and feelings?” 

“I tempted him? That’s what he told you?” Heather’s tears fell down, then her head turned away. After a long silence, she said in a quavering voice, “Mincoff raped me, but I didn’t kill him. Can I go now? Yes, Harrison watched me raped by another man. That’s all what happened in that room.”

 

**[///]**

“She’s lying.” Said Carisi behind the mirror, “She just repeated what Lieutenant said, no specific feelings or personal words.”

Rollins nodded, “And the affair, it’s just a way to prettify what had happened to spare her feelings. There must be something horrible happened to her.”

“So what?” answered Stone, “She and Harrison had the same statement about the rape, and there is no evidence to prove their have the responsibility to the explosion. We can’t keep on going. Considering Harrison’s wealth and connections, he was likely to escape from punishment since Mincoff had been dead.”

Rollins watched Heather for a while, then turned to Carisi, “Hey, Carisi, is it bothering you that Evelyn is tough woman, she always makes up her mind, just like she doesn’t need anyone…or…”

Carisi disagreed, “Nah, she’s not. But go on.”

Rollins continued, “Heather was just on the edge of breakdown, but she came to herself at the last minute. There must be something more valuable she wants. Since Heather and Evelyn are Mincoff’s PhD, both of them should have the same regard for some issues.”

 

**[NYPD]**

When Stone arrived in the police station, he was still shocked by arresting Harrison in the motions court for raping Heather. Then he saw Evelyn standing in the hall and staring at Harrison with anger.

He walked quickly into Benson’s office, “So Heather retracted her confession. But what’s that? Is Eve another victim? Did that bastard rape Eve, too?”

“For God sake, you and Carisi asked the same question as soon as you came in.” Benson shook her head, “Evelyn summited report to the academic committee for Heather’s paper plagiarism and sexual bribes.” She turned to Fin, “See, that’ the normal way I said for a student to deal with her Professor.”

Carisi glanced at Stone and then said, “Eve told me that the Massive Biology Group controlled seven top academic journals. The more you published papers on the top journals, the more chances you can get good job, the honor, the funding and something like that. Thousands of people do experiments, write papers and wished to be published. It’s very difficult. Besides, the Company offers limited jobs for the most talented one. The PhD students in Mincoff’s lab are scrambling for the promising work, meanwhile they have to compete with the scholars from all over the world. If you are one of them, what will you do? Many people just throw themselves into research and wait for good luck, but Heather got a shortcut.”

Benson added, “The academic committee has withdrawn her papers and begins investigate the sexual bribes with the board of Massive Biology Group.”

“On the surface, Heather stole the credits and had an affair with Harrison for these privileges.” Stone nodded, “So that’s why she retracted her confession. There is still a chance for her to restart despite of plagiarism, but the sexual bribes, all the professors will keep away from her and it will ruin her career. It makes sense. The rape claim will be the only way to get rid of the accusation of sexual bribes.”

Benson answered, “Yes, she claimed that both Mincoff and Harrison raped her in the room of the Green Grand Hotel, and it was not the only once.”

Stone turned to Carisi, “If the rape is true, there’s something I need to ask Eve.”

 

**[Interview Room]**

Evelyn sat in the couch, she looked lonely and frail. Carisi stood in front of mirror and watched her.

Evelyn looked very calm, she said, “Those papers are all mine, I always Bcc to my mailbox when professor Mincoff required me to send the final version of paper, and I have proof of the original data and experiment ideas.”

“We believe you, Evelyn,” answered Benson, “the academic committee has withdrawn Heather’s paper, which proves your words. But we want to know why don’t you say no to Mincoff for so long? It’s your paper, your ideas.”

Evelyn sighed, “I can’t. Since you are in academic field, the professor control your degree and career. People like Mincoff and Harrison, they possess the top scientific resources and determine how far you can walk. If you say no once, you never get another chance, which means all your work will be worthless and you will go back home without degree or job. The door of academic field is shut down in your face forever.

Benson asked, “Do you know the relationship of Harrison and Mincoff?”

“Actually, there’s some rumors about Harrison and Mincoff among students. They said Mincoff always pimped female students to Harrison. I don’t know if it was true.” Evelyn raised her eyebrows, “But when the author’s name of your paper was replaced by others’ and some girl suddenly became the professor and big wheel’s new favorite, you know something really happened.

Benson was silent for a while, “Evelyn, I am sorry I have to ask the next question.”

Carisi had a deep frown on his brow and his hands balled themselves into fists. 

Benson continued, “Did Mincoff or Harrison rape you?”

Evelyn answered clearly, “No.”

Benson’s face turned into a look of concern, “You don’t have to say it right now if you don’t want to. But you must know it’s not your fault. You are not the one who should be ashamed of.”

Stone leaned towards to Evelyn, put his hand out but then stopped. His voice was small but gentle: “Don’t worry, I am sure now Carisi want to protect you more than anytime.”

Benson encouraged her, “It’s OK to tell us, you know any sex without…”

Evelyn wasn't expecting that, then she chuckled and answered, “My boyfriend is a detective from SVU, I know what rape is.”

Carisi smiled with a little bitter.

Evelyn explained, “The things is, Mincoff had his own type. I guess he preferred to the girls who looked vulnerable and was relatively less capable of research. I am not. But he need working bees, and I am one of those.”

Her answer didn’t cheer anyone up at all. Benson shook her head and took a deep breath, “I am sorry to hear that, Evelyn. We’ve done. I’ll let Carisi in.”

As soon as they stood up, Carisi opened the door. Benson walked away, but Stone didn’t follow her.

He turned to Evelyn and looked at her with a look of deep concern, then asked, “All these, Eve, all these, the unfair treatment, the stolen credits, the deprived of achievements, why?” 

She smiled a little, but her eye’s full of sadness, “You don’t understand how hard it can be when a woman try to prove her capability where men domain. But if that’s all your career dreams which you have fought for…like…your whole life, you will put up with anything, even it’s a nightmare.”

Stone shook his head slightly and sighed, “Oh, Eve…” He stepped forward to Evelyn. His arms moved, but Carisi walked quickly to clasp Evelyn in his arms.

 

**[///]**

Heather was completely breakdown. She told Rollins that Mincoff and Harrison raped her more than once. She cried, “I thought I would be get rid of all these as long as I get my degree. But in that room, they said they wanted to do something they never tried before. I said no, but they didn’t listen. They rape me twice, each of them. I studied so hard for the chance of joining in the Lab, I know I am not that smart, I do my best. But when another student replaced me to do the presentation in the Conference, I was raped in the next door. Do you know what Mincoff wrote in the email he sent to the student? He said ‘she has something important to hand with’, the ‘important thing’ was been raped by these monsters. Turns out, in their eyes, I was just a sex doll. I will never get through this.”

“So, that’s why you called the police in the Hotel.” Rollins continued, “Why you said that you had an affair with Harrison?”

Heather looked very anxiety, “In the hospital, I heard Mincoff died. I thought even though he died, I may get what I want from Harrison, job, money or something else, if I keep my mouth shut. But the report ruined everything. Sexual bribes? They made me! If the academic committee believes the report, I’ll lose everything. I am sorry, I didn’t tell the truth.”

“It’s OK. Everyone would be panic and make a wrong choice when facing such horrible things. But Heather, have you told anyone about the rape?” Rollins asked.

“No. But you know the students in the Lab. They are smart. I think they must know something.”

“Do you know any relationship between Mincoff and Harrison?”

“They are kind of an interest group. The Lab provides the most advanced research achievements in order to obtain funding support from Company as well as the chances to be published on the top journals. Harrison and Mincoff shared the profits and honor. Do you think if Mincoff wouldn’t die, who dare to report to the academic committee?”

“How do you know?”

“They told me. They always bragged how great they were after they raped me, like I should be grateful for what they did to me. To steal credits from others? To get more chances because of been raped? I hope they were me, so they will know how humiliated I am. I am a PhD student, I studied for years to prove my ability, I should be better than this. I just…stay in a lab full of the talented brains, I just felt terrible for myself.”

 

**[///]**

“Very touching.” Stone said to Benson, behind the mirror, “But you know what we need.”

Benson sighed, “Yes, Heather’s credibility would be questioned and the rape claim would be deem as a way to get rid of the accusation from academic committee. Evelyn is not the victim, we need more evidences. You all heard what Heather said, Mincoff and Harrison, they led in the field for years. They bragged after the rape, which implied that they had a MO. Heather shouldn’t be the first one.”

“Lieutenant Benson, I think I can help.”

All people looked up to the door, Evelyn stood there. She held her phone and said, “I am sorry, I didn’t mean to listen to your conversation, I just passed by...But I think I may know another victim, Abby Norton.”

“Who?”

Evelyn explained, “She was one of most talented students in the Lab five years ago. According her paper published when she’s working in the lab, some of her research is still very forward-looking nowadays. It’s just matter of time for her to success. But since she left the Lab, she didn’t make any progress in the field and seemed she totally gave up the research in recent years. About a year ago, I tried to contact her for some data, she’s very cold and didn’t want to talk to me, and didn’t even reply my email. I mean, students from Mincoff’s Lab, we always contact and help each other in publishing and research even after we graduate, it’s like…”

“Some Mincoff-hood?” Fin twisted his face, “What are you? Academic gang? Controlling journals and labs…you are even legal.”

Evelyn felt a little embarrassed, “Ye--ah, you are right. I never thought in that way before." 

“OK, this Abby sounds like another victim, we should talk to her.” said Benson.

 

**[Bar]**

Stone entered into the bar, found Carisi already sat by the bar counter. They drank several glasses of wine in silence. At last, Stone broke the ice, “CSU searched her apartment this afternoon.”

“I know. After interrogation, she has the motive to murder Mincoff, too.” Answered Carisi.

“Everything is normal. She is clean.” Stone refilled the glass.

Carisi nodded, “Of course she is clean. Hope CSU didn’t mess up her books, or she would turn into the Hulk.”

Stone laughed, he could not help himself, “Eve is such a nerd.”

“You also call her Eve, huh?” Asked Carisi, staring Stone’s face. They never talked about Evelyn before, though they worked together for many days.

“Is she OK?” asked Stone, “I thought you may stay with her tonight.”

Carisi shook his head, “The Lab, the University, and the Company are mess. There are a lot of things…the talk, the meeting, the inside investigation…”

Stone nodded, “I know. I never knew how much pressure she was enduring before.”

“Me either. She never told me about these, the peer pressure, the professor, the research. I mean, the grumble, yes, we all complain, but something like that? I don’t know how she survived.” Carisi’s sighed, “She didn’t talk about herself too much. All I know is she has a lot of experiments to do, a lot of paper to read and write. I never know what she has been suffering in the Lab. If I knew, I wouldn’t...”

“Wouldn’t what?” Stone watched him, smiling, “wouldn’t let her do her research? No offence, but I don’t think you can stop her. She loves her work.”

“You are right. As her man, I would never stop her realizing her dream.” Carisi remembered Evelyn with a sweet smile, “Do you know she addicts to diet coke? She loves cats, the phone lockscreen, computer background, are all cats. She can never tell a whole joke, she can’t help laughing before she can finish it. Oh…Oh…She studied Russian for only a few months, I don’t know whether you noticed or not, but her English pronunciation, some words I mean, have a Russian accent. She’s so adorable when she speaks in that way.” Carisi’s eyes glowed with love and happiness, “She enjoys every dish I cook for her. You don’t know how much she loves her research. Her eyes, every time she talks about her work, her eyes are sparkling…”

“I know. I’ve seen before.” Stone whispered.

He patted Stone’s shoulder, “See, I am not that kind of boyfriend who are used to ignore their women, right? I just…I really wish I could have more time to be with her,” Carisi bowed his head and sighed, “She said since I love my work and she doesn’t want to leave me, she plans to find a job in New York after graduation, so we don’t have to separate…”

“You two talk about future?” Stone drank the wine in one swallow, feeling his stomach burning.

“Yes, the future we both expect. The home, the kids, a big happy family,” Carisi smiled, “she knows me well. To be honest, I love the feeling that she has a strong attachment to me.”

Stone looked a little surprised, “I never know a person like her wants a big happy family.”

“I can’t see why not?” Carisi answered. “She’s a foster child, she had a terrible childhood. She didn’t want to talk about it too much. I guess just like most our victims, fighting parents, abused or maybe even worse. But it’s OK, she has me now, I’ll stand by her and wait until she’s willing to tell me everything.”

Stone didn’t say any word, his eyes twinkled in the dark. After a while, he said, “Hey Carisi, maybe you are the one who can make her soft, she’s a trooper for me. Looked at what she did. She saved a cop in the hospital attack, she was tough when she sat in the witness box, and she chose the perfect timing to report in Mincoff’s case. If she’s defense lawyer, she will be a nightmare to DA office.”

“That’s why we love her,” Carisi sighed lovingly, “I love her.”

Stone clinked the glass with Carisi, “For Eve. Never let her go." 

“I won’t.” answered Carisi, firmly. 

 

**[Evelyn’s Apartment]**

When Carisi got to Evelyn’s apartment from the bar, it was almost middle night, but the door was off latch. He pushed the door lightly and called Evelyn, “Eve, baby, you left your door open.” He closed the door and found all lights were off. He put his hand on his gun and walked forward on alert, “Baby? Are you there?”

“Sonny.” Evelyn’s voice came from bedroom.

Carisi walked quickly into the bedroom and found Evelyn lied curled on the bed. He bent down and cuddled her, “Hey, what’s the matter, baby girl? Are you all right?”

“I am fine.” Evelyn bleated feebly, “Why are you here?”

“I miss you so much.” Carisi kissed her, looking around the books and staffs scattering on the ground, “CSU came, right? Poor baby.”

Evelyn clasped him round the neck, “I’m tired, Sonny.”

“I know, baby, I know,” Carisi took her in his arms and soothed her, “you are too tired." 

Carisi looked at her and said in a gentle voice, “Hey, baby, I want to say something to you, please don’t mad at me.” Carisi kissed on her forehead, then continued, “Baby, could you transfer to another lab, or at least, other research teams? I don’t mean I have right to decide what is good for you or I am telling you what you should do. I just…you’ve had a horrible experience in that Lab. You dedicated your life and time into the research, I know it’s your career dream and I fully support you to pursue your dreams, but I just don’t want anything you love to come back to hurt you.”

Evelyn sighed, “I don’t know.” She curled up, “I’m scared.”

“Hey, baby girl, don't be scared, I’m here for you. I can’t imagine the lonely days you had no one around before, but you have me now,” Carisi’s eyes were full of love and caring, “I swear I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”

“Really?” Evelyn gazed into his eyes.

Carisi answered definitely, “I promise. I’ll protect you all the time. I love you.”

Evelyn hugged him and bestowed on him passionate kisses as a response.

 

**[Abby’s Office]**

After Benson and Carisi explained to Abby Norton why they came, Abby sat in the chair and didn’t say anything. Carisi walked around in her office and saw some medals of public-service foundation, “My girlfriend, Evelyn, once told me there was a very talented student in the Lab. I think she will feel disappointed if she knows the most talented one is now engaging in the charity.”

“Evelyn, is she pretty?” Abby folded her arms.

“Quite.” Carisi turned around and smiled.

Abby’s face became twisted, “Well, good for her. Sooner or later, she will be the most talented one in the Lab.”

“So that’s how you think those girls in the Lab, huh?” said Carisi, seriously, “using their beauty, sleeping with big guns to exchange for credits, right? Now tell me, is there any possibility that your so-called talent was gotten in that way?”

Abby opened her mouth, it looked like she wanted to yell at him, but eventually, she sat down and bowed her head. Then she said in a quivering voice, “Could you leave right now?”

Benson and Carisi exchanged a look, then Benson said, “Dr. Norton, I know you don’t want to involve in…”

“You don’t understand!” Abby stared at Benson, “You don’t know what had happened in those days. I am ashamed of myself.”

“Dr. Norton, whatever happened in the Lab, it’s not your fault. Mincoff and Harrison, they were predators, you didn’t have a choice.” Said Benson softly.

“Yes, I had a choice.” Answered Abby, “Do you know the news that a student shot Mincoff and jumped from the building five years ago? Do you know why he did this? His name was John Chan. Five years ago, I was like Heather, everyone thought I was the most talented one in the Lab, but actually Mincoff and Harrison raped me and seized the fruits of research from John. John and I should graduate in the same year, but he didn’t. I got a job as primary leader of research team in the Massive Biology. But a few days later, the shot happened. After that, I heard some rumors that my job should belong to him, Harrison and Mincoff broke their words. I thought the reason why John kept silence on the plagiarism for years was hoping to get the job in the Company. He must be so disappointed that he decided to end his life in that way. If I said no to the job, John might be still alive.”

Benson felt so sad, “You must be very guilty, and that’s why you give up on your career.”

“We all PhD students, but sometimes, you have to admitted some people are smarter than you. I’m not that smart as I expected. I never catch up with John.” Abby wiped her tears.

“Oh God,” Benson looked straight at her eyes, “Do you realized what Mincoff and Harrison did to you? Those assholes not only destroyed your life and your career but also YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE”

“So what?” Abby stared at the celling, “You already knew the whole story. I just want to forget the past, I want to make a change. I want to keep those horrible things away from my life. Just… leave me alone, OK? Thank you!” She looked at them in a hostile way                                                                                     

“You know what?” Carisi smacked her desk, “You still are those bastards good girl. You think you can keep away from those assholes by hiding in this little box? Let me tell you, Heather claimed Mincoff and Harrison raped her, my girlfriend…”

Benson stopped him, “Carisi, you shouldn’t tell…”

“Yes, she need to know this,” Carisi continued, “My girlfriend already submitted a report to academic committee. And thank you for your silence, Harrison will be set free. All the great efforts those girls made would be in vain.”

Benson looked at her, “Imagine that, Harrison comes back and destroys girls like you, like Heather, one by one by telling you that you are weaker and less capable than other students. You know people like Mincoff and Harrison, once you give in, they will bleed you dry. After years of hard work, many girls think they finally arrive at the academic palace, in the end, the heaven turns into hell where there is a demon having Harrison’s face. I believe that’s what the girls in Mincoff’s Lab are suffering every day. Those bastards never treat women as a serious scholar, it’s only a matter of time for them to expel female scientists from the academic field. Once it happens, how many lives and blood would be taken to reopen the door? Believe me, it’s not what you want. We all women, if we don’t support each other, no one will help us.”

Abby turned the back of chair to Benson.

Benson paused, then said, “Sorry to bother.”

Benson turned around and asked Carisi to leave. When she walked to the door, she found a medal next to the door, which been carved,

_The Pioneer of Women in Science, Westwood High School, 2018_

Benson gazed into the medal for a while and pointed to it, “If you want to make a change, do it now.”

 

**[///]**

“Mincoff’s students, they are tough!” Benson walked out of the room and shook her head, “Looked at them, Evelyn’s report forced Heather to claim rape. Heather was almost destroyed but still tried to take advantage of Harrison. This Abby, she is stubborn. Who are they? Despaired PhD students? No offence, I just can’t believe you get one of them to be your girlfriend.”

“What can I say, they've been through Mincoff and Harrison, who else would stop them?” Carisi answered.

“Well, at least, no one would jump from the building this time.” Benson took out her phone and they stopped in front of the lift, “I’ll call Stone.”

While Benson and Carisi was waiting for the lift, they heard a voice. It was Abby. She looked a little nervous. She took out a USB and said, “When I was in the Lab, I reported the rape to the Company and University, they said they wrote it down but nothing happened. So, I recorded some talks.

Maybe it can help, you can take it.”

Benson surprised, “Thank you, Dr. Norton, it’s very important.”

Abby’s throat tightened, “I don’t know what happened in these five years, but it seems that nothing changes. I can’t save John five years ago, but I want to help Heather now. I can be a witness if you need. To be clear, I do this not for cops, it’s for John and Heather, also for those girls who want be scientists and should be treated fairly and with respect. And screw Harrison, he jerked the smartest brains around, it’s time for him to pay the price.”


	4. The Perfect Victim I: Birthday Wish

**[Wallabout Ave.]**

When Fin and Carisi stood at the Wallabout Ave., it’s only six in the morning. It’s a dirty and small street with two big trash cans at the end. The cleaning guy seemed freaking out. Normally, he picked up the trash every day, but this time, he slacked off and picked up the cans after two days. This morning, when truck lifted the trash, he found a naked body.

After heard the guy’s words, Fin and Carisi walked cross the street. Fin glanced at Carisi and said, “You know you are going to see a dead body, right?”

“Yeah, why?” Carisi can't disguise the smile in his eyes.

“You really in good mood.”

Carisi answered, “Eve made fruit pancakes for me this morning and she is considering to go to another lab.”

“This early?” Fin wrinkled his nose, “Believe me, she won’t cook breakfast anymore.”

“Yeah, you’re right, she just couldn’t sleep. Contacting new professors and labs, meanwhile, she also wants to stay in Massive Biology to finish the research, but the board is planning to close Mincoff’s Lab. She’s anxiety.”

Fin nodded, “It’s a crucial moment for you two, don’t mess up, just support her whatever she do. That’s the secret for successful marriage.”

Carisi smiled, “That’s why I’m thinking we should live move in together…”

“Are you out of your mind?” Fin stopped him, “another change in her life? Now she will be stuck in her work and her boyfriend. You know people like her, just give her time and space to…”

As he spoke, CSU came and said, “Hope you didn’t eat breakfast.”

Before they saw the body, a stench mixed with rotting food and body assailed them. Fin swore lightly, Carisi said to him, “Eve gonna kill me, I want to throw up.”

They covered mouth and nose to check the body. The dead was a middle-age male, CSU has cleaned the trash on him, part of his body began rotting. CSU said, “Since the body was buried in the trash for at least two days, the extent of decomposition is normal. But his private part,” Fin and Carisi looked down and found his private part was seriously rotted. CSU continued, “Considering where he was dumped, the killer’s DNA must been contaminated. Whoever did this to him, there must be a blood feud.”

Fin turned to Carisi, “You thinking what I’m thinking?” “The killer must be very familiar with this area.”

 

**[NYPD]**

Carisi opened autopsy report and frowned a little, “Hey guys, time for work.” Then he put a hand on Rollins’ snacks, “Believe me, it’s not a good idea.”

Fin took the report and said, “We check the fingerprint of the dead. The victim is Eden Baker, 37, male, single. He was a worker in the Elvis’ Closet Company.”

Benson opened the TV. The pictures of body was on the screen. Benson and Rollins made a “ewww” at the same time. Benson said: “Have you visited neighbors of the dump sites and the company?”

Carisi answered: “Yes. The people lived near the dump sites said they never met the victim before, and the company he worked is a small one, the boss was his relatives. That’s why he got the job. He worked in the company for about one year. His colleagues said Eden was a shy and quiet guy.”

“And a sex offender?” Rollins looked at the laptop, “He raped two women 20 years ago and got out of the jail last year. He was reported domestic violence a few month ago.”

“Domestic violence?” Carisi asked, “How?”

“Maybe he had a girlfriend.” answered Rollins.

Fin added, “And the autopsy report said, he died before he was dumped. The cause of death is cardiac arrest triggered by electrolyte disturbances. His muscle was flaccid when he was dead. Medical examiner tested trace amounts of illegal LSD remains in his body which showed he abused drug for a few months, and his private part was poured with a lot of powerful acid. He was tortured before he died.”

 

**[Eden Baker’s Apartment]**

Baker’s apartment was small but not as mess as Fin and Carisi expected. The magazines and dirty clothes were piled up on the couch and table. But the kitchen was clean, the food was put into categories and the fridge was full of fruits and vegetables.

“A single man, no alcohol, can you believe it?” Fin looked at the fridge and shook his head.

“I can see why.” Carisi looked at a calendar hung on the wall of the bedroom, “he tried to quit drinking.” The calendar was circled every Tuesday and was written: 7:30 PM. Carisi continued, “He went to AA and tried to get back in line.” Carisi found some photo frames were dealt face-down on the shelves. He took up one of them. It was a photo of Baker and his girlfriend, they were smiling. 

“Hey, Fin, I think I know who we should visit.”

After talking with Baker’s ex-girlfriend, Rollins knew that they separated for a while and the reason why his girlfriend broke up with him. Baker had a drinking problem. Every time he drunk, he beat her. After he was sober, he begged to be forgiven. The endless loop happened again and again. She had enough. That’s why she left him.

Rollins asked, “Do you know he went to AA?” 

“Yes, before we broke up, I suggested him go to AA. He refused. Now he went there and died. Stupid man!” Baker’s ex’s eyes grew wet.

“I’m sorry. But do you know the address of AA?”

“I think I can remember.”

 

**[Alcoholics Anonymous]**

Carisi was a strange face in the AA where Baker had stayed. The skanky hair with a mustache made Carisi look like a frustrated alcoholic. Nobody said hi to him. He found a seat in the corner and watched others in the room. The old woman, the guy wearing tattoo, the pale girl... There must be some clues about Baker’s death.

When he was listening to others’ speak, the door opened. A woman in an apron came in, carrying cookies. Carisi immediately recognized her. It’s Evelyn. He watched Evelyn putting the cookies in the plates. Why was she here?

Before he decided to leave or stay, Evelyn looked up and saw him. They stared at each other for a few seconds. They both looked confused. Then a guy next to Carisi snapped to him, “Stop flirting with that chick, listen carefully, what do you think you are doing here?”

Evelyn put the plates down and found a seat in the other corner. Carisi can’t help glimpsing Evelyn from the corner of his eye. Was she angry? She looked calm as usual. Did she have a drinking problem? Carisi recalled the details they stayed together, no clue. What if she thought he was the one who had a drinking problem? He was going to get a big trouble. Or even worse, how to explain to her? He shouldn’t tell her what he was doing.

Finally, they had a break after an hour meeting. Evelyn held a coffee and walked outside. Carisi followed her. They stood shoulder by shoulder in the hall.

Carisi acted like flirt with her, “Quick question, shall we?”

Evelyn nodded.

Carisi began, “Do you?" 

“No.” Evelyn denied.

“Why?”

“I am a volunteer here.”

“Every Tuesday?”

“Yes.”

“Yeah, Yeah, I thought you were in the lab.”

“My turn,” Evelyn glance at him, “Do you?”

“No” Carisi answered immediately.

“Why?”

Carisi looked around, “I can’t tell you.”

Evelyn noticed Carisi’s look, she looked cleverly at him, and said, “I’ll cover you.”

Carisi raise his eyebrow, then smiled, “I appreciated it. So, we both lied to each other, right?”

“Yes, this is really awkward.” 

“But for work.”

“So you think we are even.” Evelyn’s tone of voice held a subtle threat.

Carisi cast a wary eye around, answered, “Nah, you owe me a kiss.”

Evelyn winked at him and walked away.

The guy sat next to Carisi leaned close to him, “Don’t think too much, dude. I’ve tried before, she has a boyfriend.”

“You know that chick?”

“She’s a volunteer and helped to prepare food. She’s nice to everyone especially to the new guys. I think she wants to help them fit in. And…she’s lovely. I called dibs.”

Carisi patted his shoulder, “Wow, what can I say, homie? Patience is virtue.”

 

**[NYPD]**

It was 7:30 PM, Carisi was late for the date with Evelyn. Today was Evelyn’s birthday, he booked the restaurant and appointed time a week ago. He wanted to give her a wonderful birthday night, but now he was late for one and half an hour. He had called her for an apology, but when he looked at the watch after all work done, he didn't know how to explain to Evelyn that he need at least half hour to get to the restaurant. He touched his pocket and the gift was still there, which made him feel better. As walking out of the building, he made a phone call, “Hey, baby, I am so sorry, I just…”

As he spoke, he looked up and surprisingly found that Evelyn was standing ahead of him, smiling. He heard her on the phone, “What are you waiting for? Come here, Give me a big hug!”

Carisi ran to her and held her tight. He kissed her deeply, “I’m so sorry, baby…” He apologized while kept on kissing Evelyn.

“Stop apologizing,” Evelyn’s smile was super sweet, “I think maybe it’s a good idea…take a walk, talk…I just want to be with you wherever we are.”

“Me too,” he took her hand and kissed it, “Let’s go.”

 

**[///]**

Usually, it’s a long distance from NYPD to Evelyn’s apartment, but tonight, it became shorter. Carisi felt they just talked for a little while when he saw the apartment building. The neon signs blinking on the street and people hurrying by. Evelyn stopped and looked up, the stars shinning down in the night sky. Carisi wrapped her with his coat and press a kiss on her forehead, “Hey, birthday girl, I have a gift for you.”

He took out a small long box and opened it. It’s a necklace with a cat-shape locket.

Evelyn pressed her fingers to her mouth, her eyes were wide. She’s very surprised, “Thank you, Sonny, I love it!”

Carisi took the necklace up and helped her wear it. He looked at her eyes with fond eyes and whispered, “You are stunning, my beauty. Happy birthday, my baby.” He gave Evelyn a long and passionate kiss until she was out of breath, then he stepped back, took off his imaginary cap and bowed, “Would you like to save a dance with me, Miss?”

Evelyn curtsied and accepted the invitation.

At that moment, the wind was through the trees and the leaves came down like butterflies. Evelyn was bathed in the moonlight which casted a glamour over her face.

Carisi looked deeply into her eyes, “Eve, I love you.”

She snuggled up in Carisi’s arms and closed her eyes. She felt Carisi’s heart beating and heard his singing.

_Why do the birds go on singing?_

_Why do the stars glow above?_

_Don’t they know it’s the end of the world?_

_It ends when I lost your love._

_[End of the World]_

If only time could stand still in this moment. Carisi embraced Evelyn like they were the only two people in the world.

Carisi’s phone was ringing. He ignored. The phone rang again. Evelyn looked up at him, “Pick up the phone.”

Carisi shook his head, “No…I…I…” As he spoke, he took out of the phone and it’s Benson, “Sorry, baby, I have to…” He picked up the phone.

After he hang up, his face was full of regret, “They found a body, I have to…I am sorry, baby. Today is your birthday, I should…”

“No, No, stop saying that,” Evelyn cupped his face and kissed him, “You are a detective, I know what I have to deal with since the day we first dated. Just go to catch bad guys. Don’t worry about me, I want to be your backup.”

“Thank you, baby,” said Carisi thankfully, then he held her face and kissed her again and again, “I promise…”

“Just go.” Evelyn watched him, her eyes glittered in the evening light. She sounded so brave and strong, “Be my hero!”

Sonny nodded, looking at her with a soft look, "If this is your wish..."

“Yes, it’s my birthday wish.” Answered Evelyn with certainty, “Be safe.”

"I love you, Eve." Carisi kissed her forehead, then turned around to leave.

 

**[NYPD]**

Benson put the autopsy report on the desk, “Another nicked body near the Wallabout Ave., in trash can. Found by homeless.”

Rollins stood in front of the TV screen, “Hum, it looks familiar. The body and Eden Baker have the similar injuries.” She opened the report, “The medical examiner said the cause of death for new body is the same as Eden Baker’s. And the toxicological analysis shows that except the illegal LSD, they found a small amount of alkaloid mixed with neurotoxin and muscle relaxer in his body. He died for less than 24 hours.”

“Is this a copycat or the same murderer?” asked Fin.

Carisi answered, “Actually, the medical examiner said both LSD and acid in his private part are not the underlying cause of death. The small amount of the toxin should be the reason of changes in his system. The reason why they didn’t test the toxin is because the last victim had died for a long time.”

“Any clue about the drugs found in the body?” asked Fin.

“They said some big research labs possess that kind of drugs, but illegal ways? Who knows?”

Fin nodded, “The same M.O., We have a serial killer.”

Benson thought for a while, “How much do we know about the new victim?”

“Steven Turner,” Rollins looked at her laptop, “in fact, he has nothing the same with Eden Baker, different jobs, ages and races. They lived in different places. Turner married and had a little girl. But we found that he had a drug abused history. He went to rehab two years ago.”

“They shouldn’t happened to be in the same AA.” asked Fin.

“No,” answered Carisi, “Baker’s AA is for alcoholics, they usually have different AA for different problems.” Carisi’s phone buzzed, he checked and said, “Huh, the guy tried to steal my girlfriend said he never met Turner.”

“The guy what?” asked Fin.

“Eve is a volunteer in Baker’s AA, the guy is interested in her. He’s a nerd, no big deal.” Carisi added, “He has been there for one year and he also asked others. No one met Turner before.”

“So you got a ‘CI’ in AA,” Fin shook his head, “And also an enemy.”

Carisi raised his eyebrow and smiled, “When the chips are down, it helps to have friends.”

The squad spent days on checking Turner’s relationships. They had to admit that Turner was a good guy and no one around him was under suspicion of murder. Since he and Baker had abused problem, they tried to get more information from Mrs. Turner.


	5. The Perfect Victim II: Lost in Love

**[Steven Turner’s Home]**

Turner’s wife talked a lot about his husband’s hard work and how nice he treated others. When she spoke, Rollins noticed that their little girl sat in distance, looking at her mother remorselessly. Rollins went to her and bent down, said gently, “Hey, baby girl, what’s your name?”

“Allison.” She turned around to avoid eye contact with Rollins.

“Beautiful name. How old are you?”

“Four.”

“I happen to have a little girl of your age.”

“Does she have a dad, too?”

Rollins took a deep breath, “Hey, Allison, do you know what happened to your dad?”

Allison turned back and looked at Rollins, “He won’t come back, right?”

“I am sorry…”

Allison’s voice sounded very cold, “It’s OK.” She stood up and went to another room.

Rollins looked round at the closed door, frowning, then she heard Carisi asked, “Mrs. Turner, did you husband went to AA?”

“Yes, every Thursday night.” Answered Mrs. Turner, “I mean he had drug problem, but he was trying to change. We all expected a new start of our life.”

“Sorry to hear that,” answered Carisi, “Do you know the address of AA?”

She told Carisi address, then asked in panic, “Do you think someone in AA did this?”

“We are working on it,” Carisi answered, “Do you happen to know anyone was close to him in AA?”

She thought a little while, “I don’t know, But I think he always contact someone. Once he mentioned a friend in AA who was very nice and patient to him, which made him feel relax. I think it’s good, but he didn’t talk too much. You know AA, it’s anonymous.”

“I understand,” Carisi continued, “Do you know how to contact the friend?”

“I don’t have Steven’s phone,” Mrs. Turner walked around, then said, “But I think I can give you his computer, he might have a copy in it. He always played computer in the reading room till late.” Mrs. Turner’s tears fell down.

 

**[NYPD]**

Rollins stared at the photo of Turner’s body. Benson passed by and said, “Do you want to eat lunch or not?” Then she turned to Carisi, “Hey, Carisi, How about you and Evelyn babysit Noah tonight?”

“Sure.” Carisi was busy with Turner’s computer and didn’t even look up.

Rollins raised her eyebrows and smiled, “Someone got a date.”

“Just have a try,” answered Benson, then she lowered her voice, “I think Carisi really enjoys the babysitting time with Evelyn.”

“Yeah, I know,” Rollins unlocked her phone and found a picture. She showed it to Benson, “Look!”

In the picture, Carisi and Evelyn held Rollins’ daughters in arms. They cuddled each other and fell asleep on the couch. “They looked like a married couple exhausted by their kids,” Benson laughed, “They are cute, send it to me.”

Rollins watched her daughter in the picture and then said, “You know Turner’s daughter. She’s at Cassy’s age. Her reaction to her father’s death, that’s weird. She is very cold. I supposed that even a little kid doesn’t know the meaning of death, but when she saw her mother…what kind of kid would say ‘It’s OK’ to death? Is there something wrong with her? Or something wrong with the relationship between the father and the daughter?”

“A little psychopath?” Fin looked up and asked, “What do you mean?”

“Latter!” Carisi carried Turner’s laptop and put it in front of them, “I checked Turner’s computer and found not only the copy of contact list but also the images of child porn in an encrypted file. Turner was a pedophile.”

Rollins said with a worried face, “He must assault his daughter before. That’s why his daughter reacted like that. Poor thing.”

“And her mother may not know, otherwise she wouldn’t give us his computer,” Benson added, “Rollins, call Child Protective Services to see what they can do.”

Carisi checked the contact list and was attracted by a few special names. The names started with “A”, followed by another alphabet. It seemed a kind of abbreviation. One of the abbreviations was

A.E with a familiar number. When Carisi realized whose number it was, he breathed fast and his hands were sweat.

“Carisi, Carisi!” It sounded like Fin’s voice came from far distance.

Carisi’s head was up, he found Fin was looking at him, “Are you OK? You looks like see a ghost.”

Carisi finally found the strength to say, “It’s Eve’s number on Turner’s contact list. She was both in Baker’s and Turner’s AA. And she fits our profile.”

Fin and Benson exchanged significant looks, then Fin stepped forward and patted his shoulder, “It’s OK, you said she is a volunteer. It’s ordinary for a volunteer to work in these organizations. Besides, she studies crime and AA is an absolutely good place to access these people.”

Benson turned to Fin and Rollins, “Get Evelyn to interrogate.”

Benson said to Carisi, “Only her work fits the profile and there are thousands of scientific guys know the chemistry. You know even she totally fits it, that doesn’t mean she is the murderer. Don’t think too much, it’s not that easy to find a serial killer. CSU searched her apartment in Mincoff’s case, do you remember? There’s nothing wrong. Or, at least give her a chance to explain.”

 

**[Interrogation Room]**

As soon as Evelyn walked into the office, Benson went up and showed her to the interrogation room. Carisi followed them until they were ready to close the door.

Benson said to him, “It’s OK, Carisi, it’s a routine.”

When Benson came in, Evelyn asked immediately, “Is Sonny OK?”

Benson shook her head, “Now, you are the one who should be worried about.”

“I must say it’s not unusual for me to meet friends in this room. But you, I never expected.” Fin smiled, “OK, Evelyn, You know Carisi is watching through the mirror. Let’s not make it difficult. We do our job and you answer questions. Then you can go home with Carisi.”

Benson asked, “Do you know Eden Baker?”

“I do.” Evelyn explain how she met Baker and Turner in AA. Because what happened before, she wanted to find a way to relax. She became a volunteer in AA. She tried to provide help to those who were suffering from drug and alcohol abuse. She contacted them privately. Sometimes, they talked and ate together, she’s a good listener to them. 

Evelyn was confused, “Why do you ask them? Is there something wrong? I can’t contact them recently.”

“Because they are dead.” Fin answered, “And you are the only one who showed up in both AA.”

Evelyn realized, “Oh my God, you don’t think I am the killer?”

“I hope not,” answered Fin, “Tell us what you did on the day when Turner died? Don’t screw around us, we know you have a really good memory.”

Evelyn sighed, “Believe it or not, I am in ‘Silence Corridor’.”

“What’s that?”

“You know Massive Biology, many things are confidential. They set up the safety cameras everywhere to monitor the staffs. If they can, they would get bathroom under supervision. So our esteemed predecessors replaced a segment of tapes in the cameras in a corridor. Then we can do something private in the corridor. I kissed Sonny for the first time in that corridor.”

Fin nodded, “Like radio silence. You can’t be seen in a certain time.”

“Yes, that’s why it’s called ‘Silence Corridor’. If there is no necessary, please don’t tell the Company. We all know it, it’s like kind of open secret.”

“How do you prove it?”

“You can ask anyone in the lab.”

 

**[///]**

Carisi smiled and shook his head, “That’s why she took me there and told me she had a surprise for me. I thought she didn’t want her colleagues to know me. I got a little angry inside for a while.”

“Turns out, she just brought you to her secret garden.” Rollins looked at him, “She loves you, Carisi, in her a little weird but sweet way. Only in that corridor, she can show you how much she loves you.”

A warmth was spreading through Carisi, he felt the heavy things on his chest since he found Evelyn’s number in Turner’s contact list seemed to be dissolving.

 

**[///]**

Fin narrowed his eyes, “So you can’t prove you were in the corridor when Turner died.”

Evelyn answered calmly, “You can’t prove I wasn’t there when Turner died.”

Fin raised his eyebrows. Then Evelyn smiled and said in a relaxed voice, “I was there, and why I want to murder them? Even I am sitting here as a suspect and tried to think as the way that the murderer thinks, I can’t find the motive. Do you guys find the motive?”

Fin asked, “Why you went to so many AA, and when you can’t contact them, why don’t you go to their places or families? I thought you want to help.”

Evelyn seemed struggling a bit and said, “Please don’t judge me. The volunteer thing, it’s not true. The real reason I went to AA is for my research, I want to study their behaviors. Baker and Turner are more like subjects to me. The talk, the friendship, it’s a way to observe. So, I don’t have emotional connection with them.”

“Why Baker and Turner?”

“They are easy to approach. Don’t ask me why, I study for years, it’s just…a sense. I know it’s not like a coincidence that they both died. But I also contact someone else and went to other AA to…”

“Build friendship?” Fin’s face was like “what the hell”.

“If you said so.” said Evelyn.

Fin asked, “Do you give them drugs when you do your little creepy research?”

“Of course no. It’s illegal. It’s just a regular investigation. I have professional ethics.” Evelyn felt a little insulting.

Fin found it’s hard to believe, “Wow, you are even weirder than I thought.”

Evelyn protested, “That's how you think of me? They are human!”

Fin heaved a sigh of relief, “I am glad you still remember that.”

 

**[///]**

Rollins blamed Carisi, “See, she didn’t do it. Looked at your face when you said her number is on Turner’s contact list. Why do you think Evelyn is a serial killer?”

“You don’t know when the evidences are in your face, it’s…” Carisi didn’t want to think back to the moment when he saw Evelyn’s number. It’s like something was crushed down in his head.

Rollins rolled her eyeballs, “Stop thinking as a cop or a lawyer, thinking as a boyfriend, OK? You love her. You always believe her, remember?”

Carisi waited out at the door. Fin and Benson came out. Fin threw the notebook to him, “Congratulations, your girl is Frankenstein.”

Then Evelyn was out with a guilty look, “I’m sorry, Sonny.”

Carisi hugged her and kissed on her forehead, “You must be scared. It’s OK, baby, it’s OK.”

Benson turned to Carisi and Evelyn, “I’m sorry Evelyn, but that’s our job. You two still have to babysit Noah tonight.” Benson’s phone rang, it was Stone. Carisi walked Evelyn out.

Then Benson said to Fin, “Stone said he can’t get warrant for searching the labs unless we get more evidences. And we’d better not offend the big companies like Massive Biology, they have a team of lawyers waiting to bit our ass. Besides, some labs guarantee that the drugs like those are strictly managed, it’s not easy to get. Now since Evelyn was excluded, we should find other source.”

Fin nodded, “I’ll contact my CI.”

 

**[Drug Man’s Basement]**

After having a “friendly talk” with Fin’s CI, the crestfallen CI brought Fin and Carisi to “the drug man”.

“Those drugs with weird names? Only in drug man, you can find what you want.” The CI bragged the whole way about the drug man, “You know, he isn’t not interested in meth, heroin or something like that. He said they are not cool.”

“Then what does he make, Manhattan Project?” asked Fin, sarcastically. 

The CI answered, “When you two meet him, you’ll know. He is like Walter White 2.0. Here we go.”

They stopped in front of door of a basement. The CI pressed the doorbell, “Come on, drug man, it’s your buddy.”

It took a little longer to enter into the drug man’s dungeon. It was a dark and damp basement where the drug man raised some ugly reptiles and planted mushrooms. The drug man was about fifties, wearing protective clothing. He stood behind the counter and asked, “Who are they?”

“They are big patron. Name your price as long as you can provide what they want.”

Fin took out a paper and showed him. There were the names of the drugs on it.

The drug man glanced at the paper, then looked up at them, “Who are you?” His voice became hostile.

Fin and Carisi exchanged glances, then Fin said, “Hey, we are working for our boss, we just want to buy some drugs. Do you have any or not?”

“No.” answered the drug man, “I don’t sell drugs.”

Carisi looked around, “Really? The poison mushroom and creatures, they all call you ‘drug man’. Come on, dude, we did as we was bid.”

“These are my hobby, the drug man is just my nicked name. You can go now.” Then he turned around and was ready to leave.

“You just make it difficult.” Fin sighed and held the gun to him, “NYPD! We are police! Listen, we could call DEA to check your little business, but we are not interested in your creepy hobby. Someone died because of your drugs, just tell us who bought these drugs from you.”

Carisi pushed the drug man against the wall.

The drug man answered, “I don’t sell those drugs. In fact, I never saw those drugs before.”

Carisi tightened his collar, “Still?”

“I…I…I think I can tell you something.” The drug man turned around, “I was a chemistry teacher in middle school. Not all drugs can be made in a rough basement. They need precise instruments, delicate science and a talented brain…" 

“Blablabla…” Fin rolled his eyes, “We are not here for you chemistry class, Professor. Say something useful, or I will call DEA.”

“I remembered something. I think I did sell some ingredients…I happen to have some special things.”

“You bet,” Fin looked around, “Most of those are illegal creatures.” Carisi cut in, “to who?” 

“A young guy, college boy I think? And he knew chemistry. He came here several times with a list. The things on the list, they are unusual.…”

“You wouldn’t happen to know how to contact the guy?”

“I have safety camera.”

 

**[Interrogation Room]**

“I told you, I didn’t kill anyone!”

A young male student shouted wildly in the interrogation room. He was freaking out.

Carisi stared at him and said, “You know what, something you bought happened to be the important ingredients of the drugs we found in bodies. And you are a student in pharmacology of Hudson University. You tell me!”

The student thought for a while, “The drug man!”

Carisi narrowed his eyes.

“I know! The drug man.” The student looked up, “you must talk about the things I bought from him. But it’s for someone else, not for myself. I swear I never made those killing drugs.”

“For who?”

“I don’t know. I never met him.”

Carisi said with a sneer, “Now, two people died, you tell me you bought the drugs for someone you never met. Listen to yourself, do you believe your own story?”

“I know it sounds absurd. But you have to believe me.” The student told Carisi and Fin that he got an email about three years ago. The email told him to go to Wallabout self-storage for an adventure. But when he got there, he only found a note and some cash in an envelope. The note required him to rent a mini storage and came back on a fixed date every two month. Then, he can keep the rest money. They never met each other, they contact through email.

“Who would say no to money, right?” The student tried to convince Carisi, and said, “He put the money in the envelope and required me to pay for the rent on time. He didn’t have extra requirements until last year. He left a list in the envelope and ask me to buy those things. Then I found drug man, bought drugs and put them at the door of his mini storage.”

Fin asked, “Do you know most things on the list are illegal?”

“I know, man, I study chemistry,” The college boy answered, “I think we cooperated so long, nothing bad happened, right? Besides, it’s not a big deal for a college guy to get some illegal drugs. I mean, it always happens.”

Carisi rolled his eyes, “Now, it’s a big deal. You said you put drugs at the door of his mini storage, you know his mini storage?”

“Yeah, No.36, I rent it under my name, but left the keys to him.” Then he realized, “Oh my God. My storage, I bought the drugs and I study pharmacology, it’s very hard for me to prove I’m innocent, right?” He felt he can’t breathe.

Fin answered and smiled, “Unless you fully cooperate with us.”

 

**[Benson’s Office]**

“I believe this guy,” said Benson, “the Wallabout self-storage? It’s very near the dump sites. All his story is logical and almost set himself up.”

Carisi answered, “The murderer found a perfect scapegoat. Studying pharmacology, doing experiments in the lab, it’s our profile. Besides, the adventure invitation email and the rent paid every two month, the murderer was testing. He need to find someone who is curious but not bold enough to find him out. He spent one year to gain the guy’s trust and made the guy comply with his pattern, then boom!”

“He must have a great understanding of people’s mind and behavior.” Fin nodded, “Remember the two victims? They are trying to get back to their life. In other words, the murderer is cultivating people.”

Stone watched them thoughtfully, “Interesting.”

“The technician said the email was sent through VPN, it was untraceable.” Rollins walked in with the report, “All the notes we can get are all computer printed, no finger prints left except the college boy. And the Wallabout self-storage, Fin and I’ve been there, it’s old, the cameras was broken for years, no record. The manager, he knew nothing but the rent fee.”

“Told you,” Fin shook his head, “This guy is a fox.”

“Hey, Stone, can you get a warrant for searching the self-storage?” asked Rollins.

Carisi shook his head, “Not a good idea, it’ll spook him. If he knew, he will hide in the dark forever.”

“Seems we get to the dead end,” Stone drank coffee, “I can’t press charge on this guy. No direct evidence of his drug purchase leading to victims’ death, unless you can prove that he made the toxin and fed to the victims.”

Benson turned to Rollins, “You just said the self-storage is old? There must be many shady things there.”

Fin asked, “What’s your plan?”

“We can set a trap,” Benson wondered for some time, then said, “Ask the college boy send an email to the murderer, tell the guy that he heard the police will have a raid around the neighborhood on Friday, and hope everything goes well.”

“Really?”

Benson answered, “Which one? No raid, but if there’s nothing wrong, why do you rent that kind of storage under other’s name? The murderer, he knows what he is doing and he knows the risk. Besides it’s normal for a guy who get easy money for three years to concern his sugar daddy. Let the boy spread the word. The murderer knows his email and his background, he must live around the scapegoat.”

 

**[Wallabout Ave.]**

The squad stayed in van for three days. They parked on the road. Carisi and Rollins were swallowing pizza. Benson and Fin heard their noisy on the radio, “Hey, guys, we haven’t eaten yet.”

“Sorry, Lieu.” Answered Carisi happily, “Rollins and I are so excited to stay in the van after two days’ in the storage.”

Benson said, “It’s freezing outside.”

Rollins handed a beverage to Carisi, “Hot coco?”

“Thank you.”

“Hey, you guys are enough.” Fin cut in.

When Rollins and Carisi watched the screen of the monitors and felt a little bored, a woman came in their vision, she kept her head down and walked hurriedly. Carisi stared hard at the woman in the screen. He can’t believe his eyes. His heart skipped into his mouth.

Rollins noticed the change of his face, then she looked at the screen, surprised, “Evelyn? Why…”

Before she could finished the sentence, another man came out of a car and blocked Evelyn’s way. The man grabbed Evelyn and pulled her in his arms.

Rollins was shocked, “That is… Stone?”

Stone held Evelyn and kissed her suddenly. Evelyn was freaking out, she struggled in his arms. Then Stone pulled her in the car.

“What are you doing? Are you crazy?” Evelyn yelled at him in the car.

“That’s my questions!” Stone’s hands were shaking, “The squad is watching across the street.”

Evelyn answered, “Fine, Carisi will know I am cheating on him.”

“Better than let him arrest you with his bare hands.” Stone’s mouth in a grim line, “Now it’s Carisi, huh?”

An embarrassed silence.

Stone shook his head and sounded very sad, “I pulled some strings to unseal your file. I know what happened to you. The regrets never ends, right?”

“What?”

“You words in that night, you didn’t finished it. Thinking people you love would be together forever and another you would be completed in the parallel universe, BUT the regrets…never ends. Because you have only one lifetime, HERE!” Stone sighed deeply.

Evelyn stared at him and her tears fell down quietly.

Stone felt he can’t looked at her face, “Eve, listen. I don’t know how you went through in the past. But this is last time I help you, I’ve already crossed the bottom line. I don’t want to know why you are here, not even a little. But whatever you are doing, you have to stop.”

“That’s why you call me every day since this Monday?”

“7 calls today, you all missed. You’re welcome.”

“It’s none of your business.” Answered Evelyn, stiffly, “You don’t…”

“I don’t what?” Stone was pissed off by her stubborn, “For god sake, I risked my career to help you, could you just be…a good girl?” Stone took a deep breath, “Do you think you are the only one who lost your love in the world? Believe me, I know how it feels. It’s just like a hole in your heart that you never could make it up. Eve, please, I lost once, please don’t make me go through the whole thing again. Please remember you have a guy named Carisi loves you…”

“You know what?” Evelyn cut him off and responded with a sneer, “I don’t believe you guys love me, any of you. You just loved the sweet Eve, but I am not,” She point to herself, “this one, this one is the real Evelyn.”

Stone swallowed his anger then said, “In that case, I’m warning you, if you try to hurt Carisi, I will make you pay, brutally.” He paused, “You can go now.”

“You should persuade him to break up with me, for his own good.”

Stone said darkly, “I wish I could, I really wish I could.”

Evelyn opened the door and leave.

 

**[///]**

There was a dead silence in the van. Carisi threw his radio. What he saw almost teared him up. He was trembling from head to foot. His face and eyes were burning. He gasped heavily like drowning. He never thought Evelyn loved someone else. No sign, no warning, suddenly, he lost Evelyn.

Benson was on the radio, Rollins answered her.

Then Rollins patted his shoulder lightly, “I’m sorry, Carisi. Listen, go home and talk to her. Sometimes, people will be lost in love, maybe it’s just a mistake.”

“How?” Carisi looked very painful, “How could an adult not know who she loves?”


	6. The Perfect Victim III: Destiny

**[Evelyn’s Apartment]**

Evelyn went back from the lab at midnight. When she came in, she found Carisi was sitting on the couch in the dark. The moonlight coming in through the window. Carisi’s face was hide in the shadow, she can’t see his eyes.

“Sonny, you scared me.” Evelyn turned the light on. She walked up and squatted down in front of him. She put her hands on his knees and kissed on his lips, then asked gently, “Baby, what’s the matter?”

Carisi looked at her eyes. Her eyes was sparkling in the darkness. He loved her so much that he can’t believe her kiss with another man was really happened. He sat in her apartment for the whole night. He was angry, he wanted to question her and yell at her. But when she was in front of him and called him Sonny, all he wanted is to tell her how much he loved her. Carisi took a deep breath and tried to calm, “Did you meet someone this afternoon?”

Evelyn froze for an instant, “I’m sorry Sonny, I met Stone. And…” She hesitated, “He kissed me.”

Although he saw the whole thing in the monitor, his heart was broken when he heard Evelyn’s words. His voice shook, “Why? Do you love him?”

"NO!" answered Evelyn, immediately. She was freaking out a little bit by Carisi's question, she tried to explain to him, “I’m sorry Sonny. It’s a mistake. Stone asked me to meet him this afternoon. He said he has something important to tell me in person. I went there. He came out of the car and kissed me. I swear I didn't want to, it happened so fast, I don’t know how to react. Then I was pulled in the car. Nothing happened, I swear! Please, Sonny, you have to believe me.”

“In the car…”

Evelyn explained rapidly, “Nothing happened, I swear to God! There’s nothing between me and him. He just said he still loves me, but I told him I don’t love him. Please believe me, Sonny. The kiss, it happened too fast, it didn't mean…please don’t mad at me…” She grabbed her phone and unlocked it with quivering hands, “I can prove it. He called me many times…”

Carisi took the phone from her hand and put it down. He didn’t look at it. Evelyn was not a criminal, she didn't need prove anything to him. He enclosed her in a hug. In Carisi’s eyes, Evelyn was crying and frightened. That’s the last thing he wanted to see. Her tears, her intension, all these implied that he was the one she cared about. Who knew how hurtful Evelyn felt just because of his misunderstanding and Stone’s stupid mistake. “I believe you, Eve, I always believe you, remember?” He kissed the tears gently on her cheek, “In the car, did he hurt you?”

She shook her head, “No, we just had a fight.” She let herself relax in his arms and put her arms around his neck, “I’m sorry, Sonny, you must be very upset. It’s all my fault.”

“Don’t say sorry to me anymore.” He held her face close to his and looked into her eyes, “I love you, Eve, I believe you. That’s all I want to say to you. I am sorry I just too…It’s so tough on me when I thought you might love someone else. I love you Eve, so much. I just can’t imagine you would break up with me…” Carisi's hands brushed her hair, "Don't leave me, Eve. Promise me." He look down and kissed her deeply for a long time, then he stared into her eyes and whispered, “Tell you love me, Eve, say it, say you love me! Just three word, say it!”

Evelyn watched him for a few seconds, then she had a deep sighed, “I love you, Sonny. I am so lucky to have you.”

  

**[NYPD]**

As soon as off time, Carisi closed his laptop and ready to leave.

“Why so hurry? Date?” Fin looked up at him, “No offense, but you know it’s Friday, Evelyn is still in the lab, right?”

“Not now.” Carisi raised his eyebrow, “She got one week vacation since today, and she’s waiting for me to go home.” He took up the phone and found the photo Evelyn sent to him half an hour ago, then showed it to Fin, smiling, “See, she is cooking Italian dinner for me right now. The dessert, not bad, right?"

"You never said she is good at cooking." Fin looked at photos and asked.

“No, she didn’t,” Carisi had a smug look, “but she googled. And my mom loves to teach her how to cook on the phone."

Fin laughed, “Anyway, you will enjoy anything she feeds you.”

“Definitely!” answered Carisi, cheerfully.

“Look at you,” Fin nodded, “I bet you've already picked the middle name for your first boy.”

“Dominick, of course.” Carisi put on his coat and answered proudly.

When Carisi turned around, Rollins called after him. Rollins lowered her voice, “You and Evelyn, you’re OK?”

“Yeah, yeah, we talked yesterday,” Carisi shook his head slightly, “it’s just a stupid mistake. We both agreed to forget like it never happened.”

Rollins agreed, “That’s great…”

Then they heard Stone’s voice, “Carisi, do you have a moment?”

Carisi and Rollins looked up and saw Stone was standing in front of Benson’s office.

Rollins had to fight down a laugh, “Not that easy to forget, Huh?”

Carisi glanced at Rollins, then walked out with Stone.

Stone and Carisi were stood outside of NYPD building. Night fell and the wind was blowing. They watched the people on the street fastening their clothes and hurrying by.

Stone didn’t looked at Carisi, “I’m sorry about the ki....”

“Please, stop,” Carisi found himself hard to bear the word, “You should say sorry to Eve, she’s freaking out.”

Stone nodded, “She should.” After a pause, he continued, “There is nothing between me and Eve. It never has, and it never will. Yesterday was just…a mistake…after a few drinks…”

“Drinking at work?” Carisi felt a little surprised, “Never see that coming”

Stone paused for a few seconds, realizing he and Evelyn gave different details about what happened yesterday. Then he took a deep breath, “It just came out wrong. Please forgive me. I hope…”

“Hey Stone,” Carisi cut off, “we are cool. I know it’s hard since…Eve is like some kind of consolation to you. After all, it’s a way to fix our inside by loving someone.”

Stone watched Carisi thankfully, “Thank you, Carisi.”

“But not by loving my girlfriend.”

Stone smiled, and then shook his head, “Sorry.”

Carisi patted his shoulder and smiled, “ADA and cops, I should know we shared the same taste in women.”

“Grab some beer?”

Carisi refused, “Eve is waiting for me.”

When Carisi was ready to leave, Stone suddenly stopped him, a strange expression came over Stone’s face, “Carisi, don't take this the wrong way, but…keep an eye on her, OK?”

 

**[Wallabout Self-Storage]**

Since no suspect showed up in the Wallabout Self-Storage last week, the squad searched the murderer’s self-storage. When they opened the door, they were surprised by what they saw. It’s like a simple lab. There were experimental equipment, operating chair and several closets. Carisi opened one of them where there was a dozen of new surgical gowns. He said, “Guess whose DNA wouldn’t be found.”

“Very thoughtful.” Rollins’ mouth quirked, “I found some pills, powders…and injectors.”

Carisi looked around, “The M.E. said the toxin must use aqua.” He checked the closets and found a lot of files. Some of them seemed experimental data and complicated formula. He asked the officers to take all the files back to Department. After found a bunch of powerful acid bottles in another closet, there’s nothing left. Carisi stood in the middle of the storage for a while. He felt he missed something.

Then he realized, unlike other serial killers, this killer has, “no souvenir.” He faced the empty walls and his eyes lost in thought, “We didn’t found anything about the victims. If we hit his lair, that means the victims are nothing to him. That’s unusual. Is there any possibility that the murderer has other sites?”

“Maybe,” Rollins put on the finishing touches, “Do you remember how the murderer set the college boy up? He is a subtle character.”

 

**[NYPD]**

It spent hours for Carisi to check and read the files found in self-storage. Even after off work, he decided to study those files. A box after another, he was almost buried in the data. Then he stood up, got himself a cup of coffee and called Evelyn to ask how about the party with her colleagues. He turned around and found several boxes were put under the desk. He got several of them and hope find something new.

As he picked up several paper from one box, his heart was frozen. It recorded some conversations with “the subject” descripted in details. He searched other boxes and found more papers like this. He even found a cover named after the victim—Steven Turner. His stomach turned over. It’s like a diary. Carisi went through the diary very quickly and found the murderer record everything when he met the victim. Carisi checked other boxes over and got the diary about Eden Baker. Although they were creepy enough to make people feel goose bumps, it’s not surprising that they belonged to a serial killer. But when another cover of the diary came in, Carisi let out a gasp of fear. A familiar name was on the cover—Alexander Mincoff.

Carisi's mind had gone blank with shock.

Eden Baker, Steven Turner…and…Alexandar Mincoff.

There was only one person in this world can connect to these three.

No, it can’t be.

Carisi smashed the files and kicked the desk, then he made himself to calm down and digged through all the boxes. He carried all the diaries in his pocket and put the boxes back, then called Benson for a few days off.

After finishing all these things, he sat down heavily. He stared at the lights for a long time, unconsciously.

A message came in. Carisi looked at the phone, it was Evelyn.

He didn’t read the message, he felt he can’t looked at Evelyn’s name. The feeling of upset, disappointment and fear took hold of his heart.

How? How it could be?

He need the answer. He need to find the answer by himself.

 

**[Carisi’s Apartment]**

Day and night, Carisi stayed at his own apartment without drinking and eating. He numbered the papers, tagged and cataloged them. As he predicted, they were three diaries about Turner, Baker and Mincoff. The diaries recorded every detail about the victims, including their family and work background, health condition, their conversation with the murderer and the objective description of the way they talked, the words they chose to use, the clothes they wore, their gestures and tones, their emotions and reactions, their looks and movements. As time went by, the murderer gained the victims’ trust by talking with them, supporting them, giving advices and provide drugs. Besides, the diary also included Turner’s several sexual assaults and abnormal obsession with his own daughter as well as Baker’s intention of sexual assaults to women. The murderer observed, recorded, analyzed and generalized M.O. of the victims from all those information, moreover, he attempted to make the predictive analytics of their behaviors.

Carisi was cold inside, like lead in his breast. Not only did the murderer have strong knowledge of chemistry, but also dive deep into human behaviors and minds. Not to mention he must know the victims. Guess who fitted the profile?

Carisi wanted to deny but drowned in overwhelming rage and suspicions. He remembered he met Evelyn in Baker’s AA, saw Evelyn’s number on Turner’s contact list, and Stone’s word “keep an eye on her”. His thought suddenly flashed through his mind. He remembered Stone was also in Benson’s office on the day they planned to set a trap for the murderer, after that, he stopped Evelyn on Wallabout Ave when the squad kept the whole street under surveillance, then the murderer seemed to disappear.

Carisi replayed the video of Evelyn and Stone’s meeting again and again. From the way and the direction of Evelyn’s movements, he can tell it’s a totally accident for Evelyn to meet Stone on the Ave. And the kiss, it was a perfect way to distract his attention from the critical question “Why is she here”. Evelyn was the one who should show up in the Wallabout self-storage on that day and she was the exact murderer they tried to arrest.

Carisi was so despaired that he repeated to himself hundreds of times that Evelyn can’t be the murderer. There must be something wrong. She saved him in the hospital attack, reported to academic committee to move forward with the case and stood in the witness box twice to bring the bastards to justice. She’s so brave, how could she be a murderer?

Casisi remembered every beautiful moment they spent together. He remembered her focused look and the light in her eyes when he spoke. He remembered the happiness when she called him Sonny. He remembered all her sweet-talk. He looked back at the dance at her birthday night, her eyes, her face and her smile, she looked like an angel to him. He thought of how sincerely when he said “I love you, Eve”.

“I don’t have emotional connection with them.”

He suddenly realized the true meaning of the words she spoke in the interrogation room. Finally he captured the hesitation and unnatural shining in her eyes at that night when she was cuddling in his arms and said, “I love you, Sonny.”

He closed his eyes and threw himself into extreme distress. There was a moment that he thought he had everything, but turned out all he had were lies. If this was the only truth, there must be another diary, about him—Dominick Carisi.

He took out the phone and speed dialing Evelyn with a quivering hand. It was the hardest moment before Evelyn picked up the phone. He hoped she miss the call but he wanted to hear her voice. He wanted to ask why and wanted to hear her denial to all those things no matter how stupid her excuses were.

“Sonny, I was just thinking of you.”

Carisi swallowed a lot of questions and emotions, his voice sounded a little rough, “What are you doing, baby?”

“What else I am gonna do? The lab things. I have to stay for the test results. It’s so late, why are you still up? I’ve drank three cups of coffee since nine, now I am checking my life insurance…” It sounded like Evelyn sitting next to him and muttering in his ear. Carisi smiled bitterly.

“Hey, baby, I…I have a field work, I can’t contact you in a few days.”

“Promise me be safe, OK?”

Her voice sounded full of love and care. Carisi’s eyes were watery, “Of course, baby.”

“Call me as soon as you come back.”

“Yes, baby,” Carisi’s voice was choking.

Evelyn sounded a little worried, “What’s wrong, baby? Are you all right?”

“Yes, Yes, I just…” Carisi took a deep breath, “I miss you.” All the feelings came rushing in, Carisi can’t take one more word, “I love you, Eve.” Then, he hang up the phone.

 

**[Evelyn’s Apartment]**

Carisi was standing in Evelyn’s apartment. As far as Carisi knew, Evelyn wouldn’t be back to her apartment if she stayed over 12 at middle night. It’s a small place, but it didn’t easy for him to find what he want. Carisi had a lot of sweet time in her bedroom and living room which he was very familiar with. In other words, it’s highly impossible to find the diary in these two places. However, Evelyn had a lot of books and paper on her desk and closets.

Since the diary was broken up to preserve, it’s much more difficult to pick up all of them. He moved several books and found a laptop. It’s an old model. Evelyn didn’t use it too much. He never notice it until now. All the diary he found were printed-out, which means there’s an electronic version. If he was lucky enough, it would save a lot of time. He opened it. A line appeared on the screen. He need the passcode.

Evelyn never used birthday or any date as passcode. In fact, Carisi never asked about her passcode of anything. He was too credulous about all these Evelyn things. He typed her name, it’s wrong. Then he tried his own name, paused and pressed “Enter”, and it’s also wrong. What was he thinking? Like Evelyn cared about him. He can’t believe he still had a bit of an illusion about her.

What’s the passcode?

She’s a predator, she’s cold blood. She didn’t want to have attachment to anyone. But she’s a scholar.

For a predator and also a scholar, what would be more objective and cooler than math? And her major didn’t need to know that much about math. What can be more convenient and deceptive than choosing a sequence as passcode?

Fibonacci sequence?

If this laptop was used not as often as others, the sequence chosen as passcode should not be too easy to know and not too difficult to remember.

How about Padovan sequence? It’s a deformation of Fibonacci sequence.

He pressed 11122345, eight numbers. It’s the common length of passcode. He logged in.

Carisi knew her. He knew her MO.

When Carisi sat down and checked her laptop, the fragrance of daisy in the bottle was released. He looked up at the flowers and reached one of them. He remembered the day she left hospital, he sent her daisy and she helped him out of the Stone-Carisi situation. But the most important was that he got a big hug from her. He always remembered their first hug. She hugged him when he was irresolute. He thought he saw not only gratitude but admiration in her eyes. That’s the beginning of everything.

Then an alert jumped out. It need another passcode.

Carisi took a deep breath. It’s an encrypted file. He had no clue for this. But if the creepy diary are all about her victims, why don’t tried his own name?

**_DOMINICK CARISI_ **

The file showed up. The truth was always simple and extremely hurtful.

He relented a moment at smelling the daisy. Never show mercy to your enemy. Carisi shook his head slightly.

However, there was only one page in the file. Carisi read it through very quickly. It recorded her birthday night. It’s more like…a real diary despite of the accurate depiction of changes in his emotion.

Is that all? That’s impossible. The serial killer rarely changed their MO. He looked up and watched a whole bunch of paper on her desk. It would be easy to find her apartment been searched if he checked the paper. Then he found another encrypted file and entered all the victims’ name as passcode. It failed. Since he only found two files, and obviously he’s alive, the other one was most likely about another victim they didn’t know, and probably alive. But there’s no way Carisi could figure out the next victim’s name.

He closed the laptop and put the books back on it. Then he stood up but his eyes fell upon the daisy on her desk. At least, she didn’t lie to him about this. He hold it up and wanted to take away with him, but having second thought, he put it back in the bottle. Carisi turned off the light and left Evelyn’s apartment like he never came.

Game on, my dear Eve. When the love of life turned into the archenemy, the only thing you can do is to defeat her. The Cop and the predator, they are meant to meet each other.


	7. The Perfect Victim Ⅳ: A Real Police

Carisi stalked Evelyn for three days. She acted like normal, stayed in the lab for the whole day, sometimes ate in the nearby restaurants and went home in the night. But there was something unusual happened. Carisi noticed that she ate with the same guy for two days. The guy did not seem her colleague because he left after they finished the dinner. The guy talked a lot and Evelyn gave him a small paper bag when he seemed depressed.

Carisi followed the guy to grocery store. He found the guy was wandering around the shelf of alcohol and finally decided to leave. Carisi pretended to crash into his right arm accidentally. The guy dropped the paper bag where two pill bottles rolling out. Carisi stooped down quickly and picked up bottles. The guy grabbed the bottles before Carisi put them in the paper bag, he sounded a little angry, “Hey, give me that!” The guy folded the bag and put it in his pocket.

Carisi apologized to him and watched him leave the store. Obviously, the guy was an alcoholic who was quitting drinking and had no idea that he was as the same as other victims. And the bottles in the paper bag were filled with some white pills without label which must be the LSD provided by Evelyn. Carisi was pretty sure that the guy was the next victim, but Evelyn did not take further action. Since her storage was searched by the police, she should know that the police was targeting her, which meant her plan was messed up. The perpetrator was always panicky in this situation. The more nervous they were, the more mistakes they would make. Carisi knew that maybe a little effort would make Evelyn take a desperate action.

He took out of the phone and called Evelyn. She answered the phone. Her voice was delightful but a little tired, “Sonny, are you back?”

Carisi thought he would handle this smoothly after knowing what she did, but actually it felt really hard to lie to her. He adjusted his feelings and said, “No, I just got a short break and… it’s good to hear your voice.”

Evelyn silenced for a few seconds, then said, “I miss you, Sonny.”

Carisi almost melted down. He answered her from his instinct, “I miss you, too, baby.” He sat in the car and his heart started trembling. How did they make it this far? He didn’t even tell which word he said was true, not to mention what she said.

He took a deep breath and said, “Hey, baby, I may be back in one or two days. When I am back, I think it’s time for us to move in together.” He planned to move in with Evelyn since Mincoff died, so he could have more time to be with her. His plan was delayed due to Evelyn’s great pressure of changing research. Although he always tried to find a good timing to talk about living together a few weeks ago, he never thought he would say that as a trap. Carisi could barely hear what she was saying. His mind was becoming a jumble. He knew exactly how stressful Evelyn was feeling and the end he was leading to because of what he said.

The next night, Carisi watched almost all the staffs leave the building of Massive Biology without Evelyn. The security of the Company were on patrol. Around 11 o’clock, the guy Carisi followed in the grocery store showed up. He stood in front of the door and made a phone call. Then Evelyn came out and invited him to enter. 

This was it. Carisi took a deep sigh and hung his head. He didn’t know he should be thankful to find out what Evelyn intent to do or be disappointed to her. If she decided to stop… but she just couldn’t stop, could she?

The guy entered the building for nearly half an hour. Enough small talks, Carisi thought, Evelyn should be ready to do what she need to. He walked into the building and no surprisingly, was stopped by the security.

Carisi explained deliberately, “I’m here to fetch my girlfriend, Evelyn, 13th floor. She’s still...emmm...working…”

“Yeah, Yeah, I know you,” the security guy nodded, “the workaholic girl’s boyfriend, I met you several times before.” He opened the access control and showed Carisi in, “I guess it shouldn’t be easy to be a boyfriend of that kind of people, but unfortunately, this building is full of such…you know…”

Carisi couldn’t agree more. He took the lift to the 13rd floor. The sound of the elevator was extremely piercing in the deep night. The door opened. The hallway was dark, there was only dim green light of emergency exit signs shining. The Lab became a horrible maze in the night. The endless white wall and the metal doors looked cold and twisted.

Carisi never felt in that way when he came here to meet Evelyn before. He held his gun and a flashlight, moved very carefully and tried to avoid making any noises. He checked every window of the doors and walked through the hallway, then took a turn. There was a heavy door in front of him. He was close to the glass on the door. There was a room lighting up in the end which made his blood boil. He turned the handle of the door and it was locked.

Carisi turned around and ran to the hallway where he thought might saw an emergency escape route. He check the route and found there was the two way out of the corridor, one was the heavy door, there other one was the emergency exit on the other side. Luckily, the room lighted up was just for brain detection other than some poisonous agent room, but who knew what Evelyn was doing in that room. The victim was at stake. Carisi moved fast to the emergency exit and found the stair well to the corridor.

As soon as he arrived to the 13rd floor. The door of the room was open, Carisi slipped into the dark. Evelyn was pushing the wheel chair and walking out. It was so quiet in the middle night that her light footsteps dashed sound on the ground. The wheel chair slightly cracked with the echo across the hallway. The victim breathed hoarsely. She stopped and said very gently, “Be quiet, Mr Cook, we’ve almost done.” The victim seemed to have a nervous twitch in the wheel chair. Evelyn took a deep breath and felt a little annoyed, then she took out of an injector from her pocket and took off the protection. The injector was held in the air and the needle was reflecting the light from the room, shining dangerously.

“NYPD! Put your hands up!” Carisi suddenly appeared behind her and held the gun.

“Dominick, what a pleasant surprise.” Evelyn sounded neither pleasant nor surprised.

Carisi aimed at her, the words were squeezed out of his teeth with hatred, “NICE to see you, Evelyn.” It was very difficult to tell where the hatred was from, her betrayal, her killing, or both.

Carisi moved forward alertly, “Put your hands up and turn around slowly!”

The victim was struggling in the wheel chair.

“Put your hands up!” Carisi shouted, “I am warning you, PUT YOUR HANDS UP!”

“You know I don’t have gun.” said Evelyn, softly, “it looks like we lie to each other, AGAIN.”

Carisi was sneering, “I am sorry baby, but it’s for work. We are even.”

“You set me up!” a sudden, deafening roar was from Evelyn, the echo of her voice beat upon Carisi ears in painful waves. She held the wheel chair and turned around. By the light of the room, Carisi found Evelyn’s face was as white as paper. She was standing in front of his eyes but looked like at the bottom of a black hole. Her eyes became the abyss which swallowed all her life. It was another Evelyn he never met before. They had the same face, but Carisi couldn’t recognize the Eve he deeply loved.

Carisi felt he couldn’t do it, he tried to be soft, “Eve, please, don’t move. Let me…”

Before he walked up to her, Evelyn pushed the wheel chair to him. The victim paralyzed by the drugs cried vaguely. Carisi helped him in a great rush. He held the wheel chair and check the victim. The victim was dehydrated and half conscious. Carisi pushed him into a small room, taking up the radio to call over backup, but then he closed the radio and took out the phone to deal 911. He walked out and looked up around, Evelyn disappeared. There were less than ten minutes before the police came, he must find Evelyn first in case she was put down by other police.

Carisi moved and listened very carefully. Suddenly, he felt the dark was all around. He turned back and found the light of the room was off. Evelyn didn’t go far. Carisi’s flashlight became the only the light of the floor, he must turned it off, or else he would be the sitting target. Before putting the flashlight back, He felt a sudden blast of wind coming for him. Carisi shielded himself by arms and felt painful. It’s like a big and heavy thing hitting him. The flashlight was dropped. He saw a fire extinguisher laying on the ground and Evelyn ran to corner.

Carisi followed her to another hallway. All the doors of the rooms were closed. He held his breath and checked very carefully. One of the doors was swaying too little to notice. He got close to the window of the door. It was dark inside, but from the shelves of tubes which were reflecting back the moonlight, he could tell it was a big room for lab equipment. Evelyn must be hiding there.

He held his gun and went into the room. The moonlight got in through the big landing windows, all equipment was shining the cold light. He tried to explain, “Evelyn, I know you are here, come out, let’s talk, I don’t want to hurt you.”

He walked through the shelves and saw his own shadow on the aisle. Then he glimpsed Evelyn’s shadow from the corner of his eye. Carisi turned around and ran to her. The shelf fell on him. As soon as he pushed himself out of the shelves and crawled to his feet, a heavy metal bottle hit on his face. He clenched his jaw against the pain and looked up. Evelyn was holding a small dewar standing in front of him and was ready for the next attack. When Evelyn raised the dewar, Carisi grabbed the bottle and threw her against the wall.

“Never trained as a fighter, huh?” Carisi breathed heavily and wiped away the blood on his face. Evelyn pick herself up off the ground and stepped back to the Clean Bench. When Carisi went around the Bench, she held a stool as a defense and went back to landing windows. Carisi was too nervous to go up because he was afraid that Evelyn might jump out of the window. Evelyn stared at him and her tears fell. She looked like a frightened little deer who ran desperately in the dark. Carisi felt a little bitter, “Eve, don’t be afraid, I won’t hurt you and you know that.”

“Sonny…” For the whole night, she called him like that for the first time.

“Yes, baby?” Carisi’s injured face had a gentle look.

Suddenly, Evelyn raised the stool and hit hard on Carisi’s head and arms. Carisi stepped back to lead her away from the landing window, then he pulled the stool to close to her and wrapped her in his arms, Carisi roared, “YOU MONSTER!”

Evelyn struggled in his arms, then caught a handful of injectors on the Bench and put needles in Carisi’s hand. It was too hurtful to bear. Carisi felt extremely angry and swatted her away. Evelyn hit the shelf. There was a loud bang, the tubes crash onto the floor along with the falling shelves and Evelyn laid in a bunch of broken glass.

There must be some poisonous chemicals in the injector. The pain spread from the hand like snakes biting his arms. Carisi leaned against the Bench, couldn’t help moaning and sweating. It took a while for him to recover from the sharp pain. Then he saw that Evelyn didn’t move. “Oh, my God! Eve!” He stumbled to her and cleaned the glass on her. Her neck and body was stabbed by the glass. Her blood was leaking on the clothes. Carisi’s heart chilled and his lips quivered, Evelyn’s eyes were closed and her face was pale but calm like she falling asleep. He touched her face softly, “Eve, baby, please wake up. I’m sorry, Eve, I didn’t meant to hurt you.”

It was then Evelyn sat up and hold a sharp piece of glass into Carisi’s neck. But it was too late. Carisi blocked her arm and twisted her wrist. He said very coldly, “I felt your pulse. You’d better throw that thing away.” Then he put the gun against her temple and loaded, “One wrong move, I’ll shoot.” Evelyn dropped the glass.

Then he grabbed her arms and took out the handcuff. He never thought he would say that to Evelyn, he took a deep breath and stared into her face, “Evelyn Bishop, you are under arrest for murdering Alexander Mincoff, Eden Baker, and Steven Turner. You have the right to remain silent and refuse to answer questions. Anything you do say may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police——”

His voice had no emotion, but his eyes was looking for any tiny trace of the Evelyn he once loved. After finishing the Miranda Warnings, Carisi took a deep sigh, “I’ll get you a lawyer.” He took out the phone and dialed, “Hey, Barba, I need you.”


	8. The Perfect Victim V: Echo from the Past

**[NYPD]**

The squad were gathered in the middle night. They worked through the night. The files and calls poured in from the schools, agencies and departments. Fin touched Rollins’ elbow and pouted his lips at Carisi, “He watched that photo for like…hours…”

“Give him a break.” Rollins looked at Carisi and worried, “He’s been through too much. What do you expect for? Helping you find the evidences to press charge on Evelyn? He loves her.”

“Of course no, I am not cold blood.” Answered Fin, concernedly, “I just want to distract his attention, he is almost breakdown.”

Carisi was watched the photo which he put on his desk since the day Evelyn officially became his girlfriend. It’s a selfie. Evelyn was looking at the camera while he was holding her from back and kissing her. He was so happy at that time and never saw the day coming. He didn’t know what he want. To arrest the murderer and save the victim, yes, that’s his duty. But to arrest Evelyn and send her to prison, was it really what he want? What if the answer was no, how did all these end? The Evelyn he met last night, she became a totally stranger. She had no mercy to anyone and she even tried to kill him. That’s not his Eve, not his love. She was a perpetrator. His head told him he did nothing wrong, however, his heart, his heart was breaking into pieces. Why did she do this to him?

Benson took off her glasses and shook her head, “I never thought a girl could…” Suddenly, Stone rushed out of the interrogation room and looked wild and crazy followed by a young assistant with horror. Stone swallowed a cup of coffee.

“What happened?” Benson asked.

The assistant said in a small voice and seemed terrified, “Six hours, no drinking, no talking, no sleeping. She only said, ‘try harder, I’ve been worse.’ And she even smiled. Is she the hardest one or the average?”

Carisi went to the table and reached out for a cup. Stone stood in front of him and blocked his way to the water. Stone gazed his eyes and became irritated, then grabbed the cup from him. Carisi raised his hands and stepped back. Stone was annoyed by his silence and the anger in his eyes, "Do you think I want to torture her like that? Do you think it's not tough on me when I saw her sitting there?"

Carisi turned around and walked away.

Stone threw the cup and yelled at his back, “I tried to help her. I don’t want her to be extradited to another State and sent to the electricity chair…”

 

**[///]**

“Thank you, Mr. Stone, I appreciated.” A deep and elegant voice was from Stone’s back, then the voice became impatient, “But…”

“Rafael!” Benson heard his voice, then stood up, looked surprised, “Oh, my God, how long have we…what are you doing recently?” Benson paused, then realized something, “Why do you…”

“Not a good time, Liv.” said Barba, smiled, but his eyes were calm, “Let’s save these small talk, Lieutenant Benson. suffice it to say, I need to see my client.”

“Your client?”

“Evelyn Bishop,” Barba’s eyes fell upon Carisi, raised his eyebrows and smirked, “Carisi’s Eve.”

Until hearing Barba called his name, Carisi turned around and walked Barba to the interrogation room.

Benson looked at them and said to Stone, “Get ready, this will be a tough battle.”

 

**[///]**

Barba and Carisi stopped in front of the door of interrogation room. He looked at Carisi for a few seconds, concernedly, however, his voice had a little bit jeer, “I’ve met her only once, but based on what you told me before, I always thought she would end up in ICC in Hague for crimes against humanity, but SVU…the victim, I understand, the perpetrator? Where did you find this genius?”

Carisi didn’t answer, he twisted the handle of the door. Barba studied the scars on Carisi’s face and neck, his finger circled in front of them, then he smirked, “And this, she beat you really hard, didn't she? Such a badass. So, your type, huh? Do you want to accuse her of attacking police or report as domestic violence?”

“Very funny.” Carisi rolled his eyeballs.

“Relax,” Barba wore a half smile, “You have me now. You know I'm the best and I'll try my best for her..." Then the grave and stern expression came into his face, "…basically for you."

The door was partly opened, but Barba pulled the handle to close. He looked at Carisi’s eyes and said very seriously, “Tell me, Sonny, friend to friend, is this really what you want?”

Carisi hung his head and didn’t say anything.

Barba patted his shoulder, his voice sounded a little sorrow, “I guess it’s too late to choose.” Then he opened the door and walked in.

Carisi stood behind the mirror of interrogation room. He looked at Evelyn. She kept her head down and her hair was loose. She was exhausted. Carisi's stomach turned over when he saw the blood on her neck and hand turned dark. But When he saw Barba took out the wipes to her and patted her shoulders, he felt a little comfortable. It's a private meeting of the suspect with her counselor. He shouldn't be there. Carisi took a deep breath and then turned around.

 

**[///]**

When Carisi came back the hall, the squad stopped and watched him. He felt a little confused, “What? Go on. Have you contacted her family?”

“I’m sorry Carisi,” Rollins shook her head, “it’s very complicated.”

Carisi nodded, whispered, “I know.”

“Are you ready…” Benson asked

Carisi answered definitely, “I’m ready for this, I want to know her past, her real past.”

Rollins exchanged glance with Fin, then said, “We check her DNA and fingerprints. Even her name isn’t real. Her name was Evelyn Wilson. We’ve already known Delaware.” Rollins got a domestic violence report from Kent County where Evelyn grew up. The report showed that the Evelyn was eight-year- old and had multiple rib fractures and pulmonary bruising, the doctor found several old fractures on her ribs.

“She’s been physical abused for years by her parents.” Rollins shook her head, “Guess how they found she was abused. The Child Protective Service once got calls from a little girl who said she and her brother were beaten by her parents, but no one took seriously. Finally, Evelyn set fire on her house and the police came. She was just eight. And her little brother was dead in the fire.”

The Wilsons lost the custody. Evelyn was sent to one foster family to another. At the age of 10, she was adopted by the Millers. “She was physically and sexually abused for four years by the Millers,” Rollins’ eyes were watery, “Do you know what the saddest part was? Her middle school teacher told us that she’s very smart. She spent a lot of time in the library. The teacher said she might study the sexually harassment and abused for a long time, because she held a lecture in school. In other word, unlike our underage victims, they try to prettify what happened and tell themselves that it’s love to make themselves feel better and go through with it. But Evelyn…” Rollins felt she couldn’t continue.

Benson took a deep sigh and said, “She knew it’s a crime all the time, she couldn’t lie to herself and had to put up for four years. I don’t know which is worse, our victims or her.”

Carisi’s heart was clutched by the pain. He had thought that the sexually abused might happened to Evelyn, but the truth was even horrific and chilling. She was less than 14 years old, she was a child, how did she go through by herself?

Stone chocked, “Any charges on the Millers…”

“Mrs. Miller overdosed heroin and shot her drunk husband. Then she died.” Fin added, “Actually, the most horrible part was that there was powder residue on both Evelyn and Mrs Miller’s hands. Guess who pulled the trigger? Spoiler alert, Evelyn was the only witness. She testified that she tried to stop Mrs. Miller pulling trigger. I bet she studied more than sex crime in the library.”

“Reasonable doubt,” Stone narrowed his eyes, “She was just 14 years old, she’s weak and pity, she had a history of abused. Mrs. Miller took drugs and his husband was an alcoholic. Since the Millers were dead, only Evelyn could speak for herself. It was very difficult for the jury to decide who pulled the trigger. So, she was set free. Clever!”

“Told you she is professional in crime.”

The squad looked up, it was Dr. Wong.

Stone stood up and said, “I invited Dr. Wong to join the investigation and he evaluated Evelyn before.”

Dr. Wong said, “I am sorry I’m late. I didn’t catch the first flight.” Then he turned to Stone, “I’m sorry, Mr Stone, about your Evelyn.”

“Evelyn is my girlfriend.” Said Carisi, peacefully.

Stone felt a little embarrassment and said to Dr. Wong, “I am not the guy.”

“I’m sorry detective.” Dr. Wong started to have a bad feeling about Carisi’s identity of police and the word “is” he used was very inappropriate.

Fin glanced at Carisi, then said, “I know, here are two women liked Evelyn and two men love or loved her. Even you guys might hate me, I have to say, the Millers might killed by Evelyn. She is precocious girl. She reads, watches, thinks and learns. She’s much more dangerous than you thought.”

“I agree.” Said Dr. Wong, lightly.

“The Millers had a girl named Betty Miller, she was sent to foster family and Evelyn went to a half- way house for teenage girls.” Benson went through the files, “Seemed that Evelyn got a peacefully life since then.”

“Not exactly. The half-way house submitted a missing report,” Rollins handed a file to Benson, “Evelyn escaped from the half-way house. Then…showed up as a family member of girl named Maya who was sexually assaulted.”

“Jesus, could this be more miserable?” Fin shook his head.

All the people were waiting for Rollins' further explanation, she said, “Seemed that Evelyn lived with a single mom who had already adopted a little girl named Maya. But Maya was gang raped, killed then dumped by three men. The mom hung herself after Maya’s funeral.”

Carisi was shocked, “When did this happen?”

“At the age of her 16.” Answered Stone.

Rollins felt that she need to blow off steam, “Did the three guys get the verdict for rape?”

Stone sighed, “No…only one went to prison for armed robbery, the other two were set free because the evidence was contaminated.”

Carisi shook his head in pain and sadness.

“But… ” Stone continued, “One was dead in the gas explosion, one was dead for overdosing drugs and the third one was stabbed in the prison.”

Fin looked at Stone, feeling confused, “You are very familiar with the case?”

Stone didn’t answer.

“It’s not even a closure.” Benson sighed, “Evelyn must be crazy.”

Carisi stared at a file and felt poignant, “She changed her last name into Bishop when she lived with the mom and Maya. She must expect a new life. She was really happy at that time.”

Stone said emotional, “After all these, all she could get was one year’s happiness.”

“Wait,” Fin looked at the laptop, “According to the report of police, the guy died in the gas explosion had a girlfriend whose name was Betty Miller. They investigated her after the explosion. Was she the Betty Miller of the Millers who sexually abused Evelyn?” Fin frowned, “And she was missing a week later after her boyfriend died.”

Fin said to Benson, “You think what I am thinking? Betty Miller and her boyfriend…”

Benson picked up the picture of Maya’s body to Rollins, “Does it look familiar?”

Rollins watched for a while, the naked body and the dirty street, “I know it’s not in New York, but it looks like Wallabout Ave.”

“-----where Evelyn dumped her victims.” Benson picked up the picture of Baker and Turner’s body and put them together. Then she turned to squad and asked, “What else? She must murdered more people.”

“No,” Rollins shook her head, “She’s a genius remember? After Maya’s death, she got the help from the community and went to HU, all her record was continuous since then. There was no suspious death. She became the perfect woman we are familiar with until Mincoff died.”

No one knew when Barba showed up. He looked like he had to come out and was a little angry.

Benson asked, “What happened in the room?”

“I’m fired.” Barba crossed his arms and felt unbelievable, “For the first time of my career.”

“How is that feeling?”

“Honestly, offensive,” Barba wrinkled his nose, then smiled, “but I’m here for Carisi, so I can live with it.” He raised his eyebrows, “And by the way, give her water, or I’ll press charge on you guys.”

Stone turned to him, “Mr Barba, should I remind you that you’ve already been fired by your client?”

Barba glanced at him and smiled naughty, “Mr. Stone, should I remind you of Faretta v.California, besides, it was my client’s boyfriend who pays the bill.” He found everyone was watching him, then he said with a little bit contempt, “Go on, don’t let me interrupt your…Paris Peace Conference.” Then he walked towards to the screen, watched for a while, turned around and said in a challenging way, “Dr. Wong, there is one thing I don’t understand. Evelyn stopped her killing almost ten years, now why she killed Mincoff? What triggered her?”

Fin turned to Stone, “What’s Barba’s plan? Seemed that he admitted Evelyn murdered those people.”

Before Dr. Wong said anything, Carisi answered in the back, “The stress. The stress in research and the lab, you’ve already known. And when Mincoff died, things are out of control, she had to fit in the new lab, find another research direction and do everything from the beginning, which caused more stress that leads to killing.”

Dr. Wong looked at him, worried, “You really know her.”

“I know her, now I know her everything, but I can’t stop her or save her.” Carisi turned around and walked into a corner, drenching in shadow.


	9. The Perfect Victim VI: Secret Sorrow

Benson and Fin felt that they were talking to a wall in the interrogation room.

Evelyn refused to answer any questions, on the contrary, she became a mean bitch. Benson tried to explain what the best was for her. But Evelyn gave them a sarcastic smile, then answered, “Let me get this straight, you guys want the suspect to confess in exchange for a good deal. But isn’t it the best for a suspect to let him walk out a free man?”

Fin took a deep breath and smacked on the desk, feeling irritated, “You’ve got my last nerve, Bishop. We’ve already known you murdered the Millers, then tell me, did you kill Betty Miller and her boyfriend?”

There was a glimmer of sly in her eyes, “Sergeant Tutuola, should I remind you that I was found ‘NO GUILTY’ in the Millers’ case? And I hope you realize that the only evidence for accusing me of murder is the guy laying in the hospital now, HE IS ALIVE. Those diaries you found are just for research, there was NO crime intent in those diaries.”

“You drugged them!” Fin was totally freaked out.

“So that’s your conclusion?” Evelyn smiled, “You make me disappoint”

Fin bent down and looked at her eyes in less one inch, said fiercely, “we both know there is difference between what really happened and what law says what happened. Tell me what really happened.” Fin narrowed his eyes and had a greedy look, “We both know guys like you, you are really proud of what you did. You just couldn’t stop showing off your talents and triumphs, could you? Tell me, did you feel excited when they died?”

“You dared me.” Evelyn looked at him, interestingly, “I’m sorry Sergeant, if you remembered, I am professional in your little mental trick. I’m all legit.”

“Have you heard what you said?” said Fin, swearing violently, “Once I find what you did, I’d like to send you to prison for life.”

Benson shook her head, “Evelyn, please, we know what happened in the past, you were been through too much when you were a child, you were a victim, what happened to you was…”

Evelyn cut her off, “Come on, Lieutenant Benson, that’s your plan? Good cop and bad cop? Who do you think you are? Mother Saint…”

 

**[////]**

Dr. Wong cleared his throat and broke the silence behind the mirror of interrogation room, “Now we know what kind of person we are dealing with. Honestly, it’s very hard to break her.”

Stone sighed, “What’s worse, about the evidence of the murders, she’s right.”

Barba gave a strange half laugh and leaned back in his chair.

Carisi looked around the people, at last, his eyes rested on Evelyn. Evelyn’s lips parched and cracked. Her eyes were bloodshot. Carisi felt very anxiety and his fingers closed into a fist. He didn’t know whether he want to hear her confession or hope she could handle the interrogation.

Dr. Wong said, “Actually, I feel sympathy for her, meanwhile, insurmountable horror. But she is not unbreakable. If you guys noticed, Detective Carisi has found her weakness before.”

Carisi looked up, “The time she changed her name. The family she stayed with at her 16 was very important to her.”

Dr. Wong took up the case file, then drew out a picture and hand it to Carisi.

“It’s…” Carisi glanced the picture and didn’t have the heart to take a look at it again.

Dr. Wong said oppressively, “Believe me, I don’t want you to interrogate her. Because I haven’t fully understood her thoughts yet. You have personal relationship with her, it will be a cruel torture for your emotions. However, this is also your advantage to access her mind. Love and hate are always beyond fear and reason.”

Carisi took up the case files and walked towards to the door. Barba stood up and stopped him. Barba lowered his voice and watched Carisi, frowning. He pressed his hand on the case files and said, “Once you are in, it means you take the stand. And you clearly know what will happen to you two, don’t you?”

Carisi looked at Barba’s eyes, said seriously, “I took my stand since the day I tried to catch her.”

 

**[////]**

There was a short silence when Carisi came into the interrogation room. Carisi caught Evelyn’s eyes. At that moment, Evelyn’s pale face flashed a shock and unbelievable look. Then she became calm. Carisi sat in front of her and watched her. He felt so painful when he faced her. He was familiar with her every look and movement. She was the woman who he once loved so much, however, he arrested and sent her to this room. He unfold her miserable past. He swore to love and protect her but turned into her enemy in the end. Carisi tried to suppress the feeling of suffering mixed with guilty. He turned his face away to take a deep breath, then looked at her eyes and said, “Evelyn…”

“You interrogate me.” Evelyn bitted her lip and her tears were welling in her eyes.

It’s very hard for Carisi to hear. Carisi bowed his head and took a deep sigh. After a while, he took out two pictures from the file and put in front of Evelyn, “Do you know these two?”

It’s the picture of Betty Miller and her boyfriend who raped Evelyn’s sister, Maya.

Evelyn kept a distance away from the pictures, the hostility and disgust were in her eyes, but she answered coldly, “I don’t know, they are sick.”

Benson jumped on to her, “SICK is not a normal word to describe the strangers you never meet before. Just admit it Evelyn, you hated them and killed them.”

Carisi took out another picture and showed to Evelyn, “I guess you know her.”

Carisi’s voice was light, but the picture was like bomb exploding in Evelyn’s heart. It was the photo of crime scene when Maya’s body was found. Her naked body, the blood and the wound showed the pain, the torture and the humiliation she suffered before she died.

“HOW DARE YOU!” Evelyn squeezed every word from her teeth with furious anger. She stood up slowly and glowered at Carisi with bloodshot eyes, veins throbbing in her temples. Misery and hatred wrapped her face in the deep shadow. Her whole frame was quivering, “She’s MY little SISTER!”

“Then tell me Evelyn, tell me what happened to her!” Carisi stood up and leaned toward to her, he gazed into her eyes, “I no less than you hate those who did this to Maya! Tell me Evelyn, tell me who did this? Who killed Maya?”

Suddenly, Evelyn burst into laughter, then her throat tightened and the tears streamed down her cheeks. She held Betty Miller and her boyfriend’s pictures, smiled weirdly, “Don’t bother, I took care of them.”

It’s not surprised for Carisi at all. He simply listened and watched Evelyn with eyes full of pain and concern.

“That ugly face was burned into my memory. He raped and killed my Maya but was set free on the court. When I went to university in New York, I accidentally met my foster sister Betty Miller on the street, it’s not surprised that she hated me. But I found her boyfriend was the guy who raped and killed Maya. I tried to warn Betty that her boyfriend was a rapist,” Evelyn sat in the chair and cried, “Do you know what Betty did? She helped her boyfriend rape me. THEY RAPED ME.” Evelyn dropped her head in her arms and screamed, she seemed back to the most painful moment of her life, “They asked me to remember this is how Maya felt.”

Benson clapped her hands to her mouth and her eyes was watery.

Carisi’s heart was tore apart. He walked around the desk and reached out his hand instinctively. At that moment, he was so eager to embrace her, however, his arms fell limply to his side. He stood beside Evelyn and hung his head. Then he looked up around the room, feeling helpless. Finally, Carisi was aware that hugging Evelyn has already been to a dream that he would never realize again.

“Then what happened?” Asked Benson, lightly.

“I went to his place again when Betty was away, and told him I liked him.” Evelyn’s smile became twisted, “After a few drinks with sleeping pills, I moved him to the kitchen, closed all the windows and doors. Then a mini time-delay igniter in the gas stove, I got my alibi and he went to hell.”

Evelyn’s voice became cheerfully, she was tasting her triumph. Then she picked up Betty’s photo, “And this one, I drugged her when she need some comfort after her dear boyfriend died, I gagged her then buried her in Maya’s grave yard,” Evelyn’s eyes was shining, “ALIVE. I hope my little sister loved her new doll.”

Carisi regained control of himself, then asked, “What happened to the Millers?”

“I injected large amount of heroin when Mrs. Miller used drugs, I held her hand to target her husband then helped her pull the trigger. Dead people won’t talk.” Evelyn raised her eyebrows and smiled.

 

**[////]**

Barba turned around and said with a little anger, “Torturing her and Carisi like that? You guys are monsters, you know?”

“We don’t have a choice.” Dr. Wong sighed, “I am sorry.”

Barba walked toward to Stone, “Do you…”

“Save it, Mr. Barba,” There was misery in Stone’s face, “I was suffering no less than Carisi. It’s also a torture for me to hear what Evelyn has been through. And I should press charges on those who assaulted her, but now I have to accused her of felony instead. Do you think this is easy on me?”

“OK, boys,” Fin stood between Barba and Stone, tried to calm them down, “I felt this became personal. Betty Miller’s boyfriend was dead six years ago, which means Evelyn was just twenty. We still didn’t know how and why she killed Mincoff and the other two after six years.”

“Carisi is right,” Dr. Wong answered, “What Mincoff did and the pressure in the lab were the trigger. But the other two, I guess it’s more complicated.”

 


	10. The Perfect Victim VII: Fruit of The Poisonous Tree

“You guys just didn’t know how to listen, did you?” There was a frigid contempt in Evelyn’s tone, “I’ve already told you ‘I was one of the organizer of the conference’ since the first time you guys interview me.”

Carisi nodded, “And the security guys didn’t even bother to check you and you are familiar with the position of the security camera.”

“I got a map from the manager, and I switched Harrison’s room to the 13th floor. Then drugged Mincoff during the meeting. Who would doubt a glass of water handed by a little lamb?” Evelyn rolled her eyeballs, “It was me who set off the bomb in Mincoff’s clothes.”

Carisi looked at her and felt she was crazy, “You almost lost an arm! You might get yourself killed!”

“If I didn’t get hurt, how did I convince you guys to believe I was innocent? If I was not a victim, how did I get involve in your investigation? And an arm for one of the most talented brains in our field? Let me see,” Evelyn narrowed her eyes, then smirked, “He should deserve more.”

“Why Mincoff?” asked Benson, “Harrison did the same thing.”

“Use your brain, please.” Evelyn answered with a sneer, “If Harrison died, Mincoff would form a new ally with the new CEO in one minute. But if Mincoff died, it’s very hard to find a new guy to replace him to control the lab. Mincoff is the key member. Harrison? Do you know how many people in Massive Biology Group pursue his position? Just give them a chance, I don’t even to get my hands dirty, the members of the board will eat him alive. It’s worse than death.”

“So the rape happened to Heather was just an accident.”

“I planned to submit the report to academic committee as soon as Mincoff died. Heather’s case was kind of help. So I gave her justice, of course, in a dishonorable way.”

“Where are the stuffs you made the bomb? We search your apartment.”

Evelyn smiled, “there is gap between Mincoff’s death and the time you found my motive.”

“So, you got rid of them.” Answered Benson. 

“Hudson River. I floated down the stream and enjoyed the landscape. I forget where I dropped the stuffs. So, I guess now it’s your problem.”

“Do you know you look like a violent, deranged paranoid right now?” Carisi looked at her, “Since we’ve already know why you killed Mincoff, why didn’t you tell us why you killed Baker and Turner?”

“Those two?” Evelyn’s face became contempt, “You’ve read my diary, and you know what they did.”

Benson shook her head, “Evelyn, vigilante is not the right way to solve crime. You’ve studied this for years, you shouldn’t made such mistake.”

“Oh, Lieutenant,” Evelyn looked at Benson with a pity face, “I am not that kind of great person you think. I killed them just for…stress release? Or some fulfillment...I don’t know... But whatever the reason is, they deserved to die and I just did something good, executed them.”

Benson watched her eyes, “You are not law. You had no right to decide life or death!”

“Really?” Evelyn looked at her, pretending astonished, “After knowing they sexually assaulted to women and their own daughter, you just sit there and do nothing?”

“But you can’t just kill them! It’s lynching!” Benson yelled at her, “That’s not how legal justice works!”

Evelyn faced her with great grudge, “Oh, legal justice, like you really believing it! Tell me Lieutenant Benson, how many times the perpetrators were get away with rape? How many time victims sought justice but went to dead end? ‘Grant me justice, my Lord,’ Unfortunately, Themis is blindfolded!”

“But YOU ARE NOT HER EYES!” said Benson word by word.

Carisi shook his head and watched Evelyn in pain and sadness, “You have to believe the law, Evelyn, you have to believe us. We will bring those bastards to the justice and give a closure to the victims. You have to believe ME, Eve, you should believe ME!”

“Really?” answered Evelyn, coldly, “The perpetrators raped my sister were set free, Mincoff and Harrison raped and ruined students, Baker intended to assault women, Turner’s daughter was sexually abused by her father. If I didn’t kill them, then where is justice? Tell me, Detective Carisi, where is closure?”

“But in the end, it should be justice to give them what they deserved.” Carisi stared firmly and gravely back at her eyes.

“Justice delayed is justice denied!” Evelyn’s eyes were full of poison.

Carisi was, for a lack of a better word, frozen.

Evelyn looked pointedly at Benson’s eyes, “Lieutenant, we are all professional, let’s face it, most rapists who was accused were not their first time of committing rape. People like them, they will never change and they will never stop! It’s their nature and you know it!”

“So, if this is their nature,” Benson was in a terrible voice, “then killing people is your nature, right? Look at what you did, they killed, you killed. They commit sexual assault, then you did the same to them. You had no difference with them! You should feel ashamed because you are as despicable as they were.”

“It’s an eye for an eye,” Evelyn took a deep breath, “You know how hard to demand justice. You saw Heather, you saw Turner’s little daughter, you saw my sister Maya and you saw me. Do you know how hard for a victim to overcome all of these? When we are suffering for the rest of our life, how did they just build a family and live a happy life? Forgiveness is not in my vocabulary. I just did what I should do.”

“How?” Carisi watched her and asked

“Do you know when do people need a stick very much? During their recovery. When you understand their deepest eager and desire, you give them hope and future, they trust you and count on you, they will do whatever you asked them to, then you pull the stick out. When you see their panicking face as they know what you want to do at the last moment of their life, that's a feeling of satisfaction…”

Benson cut off her creepy description, then breathed deeply, “They paid their life for what they did, then, what’s your price for that?”

Evelyn smiled, said peacefully, “Every day since I was 16.”

Carisi gazed into Evelyn’s face and his forehead was all puckered. He began to feel that there was something wrong because what Evelyn said seemed so familiar to him.

 

**[////]**

“Oh my God,” Dr. Wong’s face changed color, “I think I know her pattern, you guys should keep Detective Carisi away from her, just get him out of the room.”

Fin asked Carisi to come out.

Carisi looked around and was confused, “What?”

Dr. Wong explained, “All her victims had a relationship with her. Parent-child, professor-student, sisters, some fake friendship with the guys in AA.”

“And me.”

“Yes, no strangers.” Dr. Wong nodded, “She set fire at eight, shot and murdered her foster parents at 14…”

“And the way she talks,” Fin added, “I know the answer, she is a psychopath. They are similar.”

“I am afraid I can't agree with you,” Dr. Wong said, “I prefer the more scientific definition, Anti- Social Personality Disorder. And it's SHE. There are some different performances between female ASPD and male ASPD. Female ASPD are less violent but good at manipulation, which means they tend to ruin the intimate relationship. Some researchers think the number of female ASPD are much less than male. But in my opinion, if we could gather the data from the domestic violence and mental abuse in intimate relationship, the number of female ASPD might be surprised.”

“But she’s very violent.” Fin felt it’s hard to believe, “She murdered 8 people at least, and brutally.”

“In her case, I think you’ve already noticed that all the crime she committed were premeditation, not impulse. Compared with other female ASPD, it is her childhood experiences to increase the possibility to resort to violence.”

Fin ponder for a while, then asked, “I thought they are born in this way, and their emotional reactions shouldn’t be…”

“Nature or nurture, we don’t have a solid conclusion for the causes of ASPD, but psychological trauma in childhood is one of them. Normally, ASPD don’t have such strong emotions as she has, but obviously, murder and arson are not a normal way for an underage girl to deal with her problem. She was traumatized severely during the formation of the personality.”

“Her crime frequency is increasing and the murders became more brutal.” Stone looked worriedly.

Dr. Wong shook his head, “I hope you guys noticed that she is becoming much more narcissistic, arrogant and bold in recently crimes she committed, which revealed the radical changes on her psychology.” Dr. Wong turned to Stone, said in a sorrow, “I’ve read her articles. I know why she studies crime. She is trying to find a way to heal herself. The warrior who fights the monster eventually becomes the monster.”

“So, what does she want to do to me?” Asked Carisi, frowning.

Dr. Wong watched Carisi for a while, “No offence, but it’s very odd for me that Evelyn chose you as her boyfriend. Because she has been professional trained, it’s very easy for her to get rid of the unhealthy attachment with you after enduring extreme conditions in the hospital attack. On its surface, she just did what the ordinary people did, it sounds normal, but for her, it’s abnormal. Besides, Mr. Stone spent more time with her than you did at the beginning. Constant companion is one of primary ways to begin a love story. I know it’s ruthless to say that even love has its own logic.”

“What do you mean?” Carisi stared at his face and had a secret stronger feeling of been deceived.

“You still love her?” Dr. Wong looked up at Carisi’s.

Neither did Carisi answer nor deny. He whipped around to look at Evelyn then turned back, smiled bitterly. He bowed down, frowned and shook his head slightly seemed like laughing at himself.

“Actually, it’s a question, Detective Carisi. See, that’s how people react when mentioning someone who they love. You don’t even need to hear their answer,” Dr. Wong sighed, “The more intimate you are, and the more destructive she would be. She can’t build a normal and healthy relationship with anyone. In other word, what she said or did to you are just for manipulation. You must feel very free and comfortable to be with her. That’s her talent, that’s dangerous.”

Barba stepped forward to Carisi, “May I have a word with you?” Barba raised his chin to beckon to Carisi and they went to a corner. Barba gazed into Carisi’s face and asked in a low voice, “Do you find something wrong with her when you two…you know…”

Carisi set his mouth in a grim line, “Very subtle.”

Barba narrowed his eyes, “You’ve already known and you didn’t do anything?”

“I knew since the first time I kissed her,” Carisi frowned angrily at him, “I can’t ask her were you raped by someone or were you sexually abused.”

“You didn’t want to ask.” Barba saw him through.

“At the risk of losing her?” Carisi answered with an unbelievable face, “I would never do that. And you know that's not how we work.”

“Let me get this straight,” Barba stared at him furiously, “You are afraid to lose her, so you didn’t ask anything. Now you are not afraid to lose her by arresting her?”

“That’s different!” Carisi went nuts, “For God sake, I am a cop! I can’t let her kill people!” Carisi’s lower lip caught between his teeth, his face was in a deep pain, “I hope it’s NOT her. I wish I was wrong. But it’s HER. God, it’s her…” Carisi clutched his forehead and shook his head. He wish all of these were not real. Until now, what happened in the past 24 hours was gradually becoming more realistic to him. He seemed to realize that what Evelyn did and what he did to Evelyn were both irreparable. Carisi breathed heavily and felt so oppressive and devastated that he had to lean against the desk to support himself.

There was a short tacit silence in Benson’s office. Everyone was looking at Carisi with understanding and regret in their eyes.

Barba released a heavy sigh, then he patted Carisi’s shoulder, said lightly but patiently, “I’ll see what I can do.”

Then Rollins came in, she looked around and said, “I don’t know where you guys are now. But I interviewed Evelyn’s classmates and colleagues in HU and the lab this morning. Any of them can’t name a close friend or boyfriend of hers…of course, except Carisi. But everyone thought she is a very nice person. That’s…unusual...she’s pretty and smart with a ‘nice’ personality as they said, I guess many guys are interested in her. She went to HU since she was 16, but she didn’t have any friend or boyfriend, that’s...”

Barba turned to Carisi, trying to fight down acerbity, “With that face and brain, you didn’t even question why she had no ex? She laid in the hospital for less than one month, you and Mr. Stone---” Barba raised his eyebrows and glance at Stone, “No offence---were charmed by her. God, I hate to say this, did the bare ass kid's arrow strike your eyes?”

“For me, she’s just a nerd addicted into research…” Carisi could not continue. He began to doubt his own judgment.

“There are hundreds of nerds in HU, you happened to love this one?” Barba seemed to realize something, so turned to Dr. Wong with a questioning face, “Wouldn't it be a coincidence?”

Dr. Wong agreed, “You are right Mr. Barba. She just acted as the type of woman which guys are unable to refuse. She didn’t even need to be perfect because it would be easily to see through by your training. With some little weird and harmless habits, it would make her look like an nerd, which is in favor of covering her suspicious tracks. That’s how she earned trust.”

“So, she fooled me.” Carisi felt a tight obstruction in his chest.

"She fooled everyone, Detective Carisi,"Dr. Wong turned to Carisi, said in a thick voice, “But you are the chosen one, her closest one, which means you are her target too.”


	11. The Perfect Victim VIII: A Person Who Sins

“That’s impossible. No, she wouldn’t do that to me.” said Carisi, stepping back and shaking his hands. He simply said no, but he knew it’s true.

“You’ve already known the answer, Detective Carisi,” Dr. Wong watched him with sympathy, “you shouldn’t have any illusion about her. Do I need to remind what she did to you? She watched you, analyzed you, lied to you, wrote a diary about you and she almost killed you. None of these means she loves or cares about you.”

“There is only one page of the diary!” Carisi didn’t know what he was insisting.

Dr. Wong’s eyes flashed a glimmer, “We haven’t found the rest yet.”

“Then why me?” Carisi looked straight into Dr. Wong’s eyes, “All her victims committed crime, but I don’t, why me?”

Dr. Wong frowned, then said, “That’s what I am worrying about. From the people who assaulted her to those who had indirect relationship with her…until you, her M.O. is changing, I am afraid she began to hunt innocent people, or even worse…”

“What?” Carisi’s eyes casted a shadow.

Dr. Wong said word by word, “Do you know the game of cat and mouse?”

“You mean she wants me to catch her?” Carisi’s eyes became fierce.

“No, she wants to know if you can catch her,” Dr. Wong raised his eyebrows, “the recent crimes she committed showed up more and more typical ASPD. It’s explained why she chose you as her boyfriend. She started to play a much more dangerous game. For a perpetrator addicted to manipulate others, which relationship can be more exciting than winning a cop’s love?”

“So, she set me up, huh?” He said through clenched teeth, “She let me fall love with her. She is  using me.” Carisi walked up and down in the room, he thought of thousands of ugly truths why Evelyn chose him as her target, but fulfilling some pervert desire was the last one he could consider. He can’t believe he devoted his heart to her, but she let him down. He banged his fist on the wall, “Am I a fool? She treats me like a crap!” Carisi threw the books from the desk, then turned around and rushed to the interrogation room.

Dr. Wong and Barba leapt forward and seized him. Dr. Wong shook his head, “Please don’t go there, Detective Carisi. I know it’s hard to accept, but please don’t try to approach her. She’s dangerous.”

“So what?” Carisi gnashed his teeth, “Killing me in the interrogation room? Fine, if she could.”

“No,” Dr. Wong answered, “Violence is not her strengths, manipulation is. I know you have a lot of anger and questions, but now, for you, she just a perpetrator. Technically, you are not even her victim. You’ve already finished your job. She has nothing to do with you. Let Mr. Stone and Fin move on the following work.”

 

**[////]**

Barba glanced at Carisi, then walked into the interrogation room and said to Benson and Rollins, “OK, cops, I think my client need her lawyer now.”

Benson and Rollins made eye contact, then went out and closed the door.

“You are fired.” Evelyn rolled her eyeballs.

“The second time, ouch,” Barba closed his eyes, seemed to pray for more patience, “Save the insult for your victims, Nemesis, you know my value.”

Barba bent over and supported himself with arms on the desk, looked at Evelyn right in her eyes, “I don’t know what’s your plan for Carisi, but as far as I know, he is the only one who truly loved and cared about you in this world." He reached out his finger circling Evelyn’s face, “From the wounds on you both, I can tell he barely hit you back. He is a well-trained police, if he didn’t want to, you can’t even touch him. He could have left you to SWAT team and let them shoot between your eyes.” Barba used hand gestures to mimic a gun, his index finger and middle finger pointed against Evelyn’s forehead, and continued, "One bullet will end everything, easy and clean. He called 911 instead of backup for more time to catch you before other police did in case you got hurt in rounding up. It’s Detective Carisi’s duty to arrest a perpetrator, however, Sonny’s love keep you alive. Even when you tried to kill him, his first concern was you.” Barba straightened up and folded his arms, “He asked me to be your lawyer. I am the best and expensive. He did everything he could do to protect you, so now, you can sit here to tell your own story.”

“Why do you tell me this?” Evelyn looked at him, calmly.

Barba smirked, “I want you to know that you got his love and his heart. What’s more, he figured out your passcodes and your M.O., then set a trap and caught you. He thinks as the way you think. You are part of him now. What more do you expect? A medal? His existence is a proof of your conquest. Am I right?”

“How do you know?” Evelyn narrowed her eyes.

Barba shook his head slightly, then sneered, “Oh, Miss Bishop, I’ve seen plenty of perverts, you are not even in top 5.” Then Barba turned around and walked out.

Barba's hand stopped on the handle, he seemed hesitated, then he turned back, watching Evelyn seriously, “I think you’ve already known how many rules and protocols Carisi has broken, not to mention he has to face the following investigation from IAB. He may lose his badge. You know how much he loves his job, but he chose you. You won. I know no one loved you in your whole life and you don’t love anyone. It’s fair and reasonable, I understand. But there is guy named Carisi do cherish you. So, do something good, Miss Bishop, just once, set him free.”

Barba opened the door, “In case you need a lawyer, I am outside…”

 

**[////]**

Carisi’s raucous scream came to Barba. Barba looked around the room, the squad was trying to persuade Carisi. Carisi stared fiercely at Benson, said furiously, “I can’t let her fool me! I should…”

“Please calm down, Detective Carisi,” Dr. Wong stepped forward to him, holding a computer, “I know you guys think the diaries are her souvenirs, but I don’t think so, and I found her souvenirs.”

The squad gathered around. Dr. Wong showed them all Evelyn’s published paper, “Do you noticed the authors’ name of her paper? There is a victim’s name in her each paper. Of course, she had no time to write paper for her latest victim.”

The squad found some familiar names in the author list of Evelyn’s paper. Dr. Wong continued, “It’s very common that there are a long list of authors’ name in one paper. No one would notice second-to-last author. The paper would be read by thousands of people for decades of years, she is telling her triumph to the world. She is mocking us. Imagine that, the victims are under our noses, but on one knows and no one would do anything. She didn’t care the victims, death itself is her souvenir.”

“She’s so vicious…and devious.” Benson surprised.

“And a predator.”Dr. Wong added.

“You know what? This gonna be fun. I don’t care what tricks she is ready to play in my mind. She lied to me, now she has to tell the truth. I am not a coward hidden behind the mirror,” Carisi’s eyes were shinning dangerous and exciting light, “Damn it, I am a cop! If she want to play, I’ll play!”

Then Carisi stormed the interrogation room and slammed the door

 

**[////]**

“Why me?” Carisi fixed Evelyn with resentful eyes.

Evelyn looked at him for a while, sighed and said lightly, “Finally.”

“Why me? Evelyn! Tell me, WHY ME!” yelled Carisi, staring her face with anger, “All the people you murdered hurt others, but I protect and help people, why I am your target?”

Evelyn answered, “People are boring. When they scream, beg and cry, you feel annoyed. Then you kill them. But you have to face the vast void after killing. So killing is boring too. That’s a dilemma. I am tired of this, I want to play something new.”

“What’s new?” Carisi sneered, “Killing innocent people?”

“No,” said Evelyn, smiling sweetly, “My dear Sonny, you are the most lovely and considerable person I’ve ever seen. You have belief, passion and love in your heart. You have hope and expectation for the future.” The smile gradually faded off her face, “it must be very funny to see how your world collapse.”

“What do you mean?” Carisi narrowed his eyes and felt danger was being stood by slowly.

“What can be more challenging than playing on the psychology of a person,” answered Evelyn, “Especially people like you, you are a family guy, aren’t you? Lovely kids, excellent wife, and happy family, aren't these your favorite? The support, the understanding, the approval and the love, they all what you want inside of you. I gave you them all, didn't I? You must feel be trusted, depended and loved. You had so many hopes for the future and so much faith in life,” Evelyn watched him and licked her lip like a monster licking the blood, “But I will take them away from you, ONE BY ONE.”

Carisi bounced from the chair and grabbed the handcuff to drag Evelyn close to his face. His eyes became blood-red and he roared hoarsely, “Since when?”

Evelyn stared at his eyes, a thin smile was on her face. Her word was so familiar to Carisi, “Sonny, I thought I never see you again.”

Carisi was frozen, his heart sank. It was the day Evelyn left the hospital and it was the first time Carisi visited her since the hospital attack. It’s from THE VERY BEGINNING.

Evelyn enjoyed watching Carisi’s face, a cruel smile was twisting on her face, “I mean, Mr. Stone is fine, but you, you are my priority. After what we had been through in the hospital, you had a higher possibility to love me than Mr. Stone did. It took little cost to make you trust me. See, that’s science, not love. Oh, I almost forget the hug in the hospital, you LOVE our first hug, didn’t you? The joy of reunion, the sorrow of parting, the restraint of jealousy and the gush of affection. You call it fate, but I call it BAIT, and you bite it without hesitation.”

Carisi can’t believe his ears, she lied to him ALL THE TIME and about EVERYTHING. Carisi gritted his teeth and the pain filled in his eyes, he felt his throat was closing up, “So, it’s a trap the whole time.”

Carisi didn't know it’s a question or just a description of facts. He knew she was a liar since he found her diaries. But it’s totally different when he faced Evelyn and heard her admitting, especially knowing he was cheated from the start to finish. He tried to find the flaws through recalling the details they had been together, however the sweet memory came back to him little by little which felt like a blunt knife cutting through his head again and again.

He felt his was floating and everything seemed under water. It’s so hard to breathe that he had to stand up to get some fresh air. He gasped heavily and attempted to control the shaking body. He walked ups and downs exasperatedly, furious that he had let himself fall. He dedicated all his love to her, then let she trample to death. Carisi felt he was such an idiot. He hissed with a grimace, “So that’s how you think of me, a clown? A fool? I am an experimental subject to you, am I?”

“Oh, poor thing, look at you, like a puppy fawning on its master.” Evelyn sat on the chair and shook her head slightly, “Is it a shocking to know that someone you loved so much didn’t love you?”

“I’ve already known.” Carisi glared at her with red eyes, “Love must be a very strong word to you. You never say it because you are afraid you were never been loved.”

“No, my dear,” Answered Evelyn, sneering, “I know you love me.”

“No!” Carisi denied loudly at once. Then he paused for a few second like figuring something out, then said slowly, “No, I don’t love you. I loved Eve, you know her, smart and beautiful, just like you, but not you. She took a bullet for me, came forward for her colleagues, had a passion for her work, wanted to start a family with me and made promises to me, the most important is she LOVED me. She’s my beloved Eve, but you killed her. You are just a psychopath and I NEVER EVER loved you.”

Evelyn’s was frozen, her eyes became dark and venomous. Carisi felt her rage and fret.

“How is that, Bishop? Someone you thought deeply loved you...actually...loved a fancy of you.” Carisi narrowed his eyes, folded his arms and watched her. There was a moment that he couldn't tell who he loved, the Evelyn in front of his eyes or the perfect Evelyn in his imagination.

Evelyn’s chest rose and fell rapidly, her shoulder quivered slightly. Her brow was furrowed. It's very quiet in the room. Carisi could heard her breath was becoming faster and heavier. He was quite sure he saw some tears before she closed her eyes. Somehow Carisi had a weird satisfaction when he found Evelyn was on the edge of losing control. He sneered, “You are a creep, but not that creepy."

However, Carisi knew he couldn't divided Evelyn into two different persons when he saw she was trying so hard to hide her extreme pain. That's all what he wanted to see. He loved Evelyn, not the perfect one or the predator, just Evelyn, who had a miserable past, hopeless present and no future. Carisi turned around, a passion of tenderness, of grief for her suffering swamped him, made his eyes sting. They were both in a dead end, but still slaughtered each other.

Suddenly, Evelyn burst into laughter, then made a face, “You got me!” 

Carisi’s heart gave a violent bound.

“I must say, Detective Carisi, you surprised me,” Evelyn’s smile was like hitting a jackpot, “your mental self-preservation, I was impressed. Tell me, Sonny, do you want to convince me or YOURSELF to believe you loved someone else? Trying to create another perfect woman to replace who you loved in order to fix the mistake you’ve made? Unfortunately, it’s called escapism and self- deception.”

Carisi’s heart was beating wildly.

Evelyn’s face looked like a shark sniffing fresh blood, “Tell me, Sonny, what or WHO are you escaping from? Me? Yourself? Or your stupid mistake?”

Carisi was too depressed to speak. The fury flared so unexpectedly and blazed inside him, he bent down and stared at Evelyn wildly, “What do you want from me? I watched you, I analyzed you, I saw through you, I profiled you, I set you up, and I arrested you. Admit it, Evelyn, I know what you think, I know how you do and I know what you will do. You rip out my heart, believe me, you don’t want to play me!”

Evelyn watched him like watching something she couldn’t understand, “Haven’t you noticed what you’ve done? You just think and do things as my way. You really burned me into your mind and your heart, didn't you?"

Carisi's heart started twitching. All he did was following Evelyn's MO. He never noticed that before. She was rotting his mind.

“Dear Dominick, could you believe your own observation and judgement after this? Could you tell the truth or lies since now? Could you love and trust someone anymore? Oh, By the way, do you want to know where the rest of diary about you is?” A queer smile broke on Evelyn's lips, "Last question, tell me Sonny, will you forget me? I guess you have to spend the rest of your life to find the answers. Dominick, I am sorry to inform you that..." Evelyn gazed into his face with greedy and blood-thirsty eyes, “...You are MINE. You will NEVER EVER come out of my shadow. I ruined their body, but I will destroy your soul.”

Every word hammered on Carisi’s heart. He exposed his most vulnerable, defenseless part to her which she pierced through without hesitation. The moment arrived, Carisi’s guard crashed down. He believed every word she said and he truly believed all the promises she made to him. His plans, his wishes, every moment in his future involved her. But in the end, she never treated him seriously. She never got attached to him. He realized that Evelyn was eating him alive in this room, but he couldn’t handle it. She was corroding everything he cherished in his life, his love, his trust, his faith as well as his heart and soul. Carisi felt he couldn’t catch his breath, his lower lip stuck firmly between his teeth. His eyes was buring and his heart was beating so fast that his stomach was turning over. He had to hold the table to support himself, then he turned away, fighting back a profound anguish and despair. Every beautiful things he once owned became giant monster tangling him into a dark hole where there was an abyss waiting to swallow him all.

Dr. Wong opened the door, said lightly, "Detective, please come out."

Carisi gazed into Evelyn. Every inch of her face once he touched and kissed never changed, but how did she change into a person he couldn’t recognized? He did all he could do to care for her, how could she feel nothing at all? He loved her with all his heart, how could she do this to him without mercy?

Dr. Wong raised his voice, "Detective Carisi, you should go."

Carisi didn't move, he looked behind and saw Dr. Wong was shaking head to warn him.

If this was the end. Carisi bowed down and was ready to leave.

But there was still something he wanted to know, maybe that's the real reason why he wanted to meet Evelyn, maybe it's an answer, maybe just a closure for himself.

Carisi stopped, then turned around. He stared into Evelyn's eyes. Every word was so tough to speak, He tried so hard to control the chocking noise in his voice and not to make it sound begging, “We’ve been together for so long, have you ever loved me for just...one single second?” Carisi knew exactly he shouldn't have asked this question, but he was so eager to hear the answer from her.

There was a moment that Carisi thought he saw Evelyn’s eyes grew tender and she even nodded slightly, but then, her word threw him to the hell, “I am sorry, Dominick Carisi Jr., you are just collateral damage.”

He meant nothing to her. Carisi’s mind went blank. Then he felt so sad that he almost went mad. He rushed to Evelyn and pinned her against the wall by the throat.

“You are evil!” Carisi’s face contorted, he growled with outrages and frustrations, "Do you know the feeling that a person you most loved became the one you most hated?”

Evelyn watched him without fear or resentment, she didn’t even struggle. Her tears fell upon Carisi’s hand.

Dr. Wong couldn't stop him. Barba and Stone burst into the room and dragged him away from Evelyn.

“Don’t make such big mistake,” Barba calmed him down, “you don’t want to end your career or her life. Out, you two are over.”

Barba blocked Carisi as he tried to step forward to Evelyn. Carisi stared at Evelyn, then said desperately like every word was his last gasp, “You took a bullet for me.”

“It’s an accident, Sir.” Answered Evelyn, lightly.


	12. The Perfect Victim IX: The Last Straw

Carisi was ordered to cool off in another room by Benson. The squad came out of Benson’s office to the squad room and left Evelyn alone in the interrogation room.

Barba sat in the chair and put his feet on the table, drinking coffee. He knew what he had to deal with next. Stone stepped forward to him with a file. Barba glanced at him briefly, “What’s your deal?”

“Life with no parole.” Said Stone, firmly.

Barba looked up at him, beginning to interest in him, “Is it a revenge for her choosing Carisi instead of you?”

“You know it’s not personal.” Stone answered with integrity.

“In that case,” Barba raised his eyebrows and sneered, “Let me remind you who you are dealing with. The best lawyer of East coast and a fucking genius cheated the law since 14.” Barba smirked, “If I can persuade her to cooperate with me, she may walk out of the court a free man.”

Stone answered, “She confessed everything.”

“Confessed?” asked Barba, sarcastically, “You mean, after six hours’ torture, she confessed. No DNA, no direct evidence for any victims’ death, of course, except the lucky one laying in the hospital, but isn’t it just a small accident in experiment? Science need sacrifice, Mr. Stone. And a scientist like her, I'm not even gonna dignify pleading insanity on the court.”

Stone took a deep breath and glared at Barba, “Mr. Barba, I hope you do know who you are defending. She is only 26, but has already murdered 8 people.” Stone dropped the file on Barba’s tummy, “We invited several neuroscientists and toxicologists to study the paper found in the storage. Turns out, the graphs and data, she was adjusting the formula through detecting the victims’ brains and physiological index after injecting the neurotoxin to them. She wanted to find the most lasting and painful chemical combination of neurotoxin and LSD. The M.E. said the victims got a shot of the muscle relaxers before being injected the combination. They can’t move, they can’t scream, but they can feel the extreme pain in their body until they were tortured to death. She is a Nazi. If she came out, how many people will be killed by her, and guess who will be the first one.”

Stone took a breath, “Even though, I have to admit that I don’t want her to go to trail to go through this again. Mr. Barba,” Stone tone down his language, “Just accept the deal. You know the people in this world who concern her are all in this room.” Then he left.

Barba went silent. Benson walked to Barba and asked, “What about the deal?”

Barba turned to Benson, said in a deep voice, “I was planning to send her to the mental house. But… Stone is right, Carisi will be the first one she’s coming after if she came out. I’ll tell Carisi about the deal.”

 

**[////]**

Dr. Wong didn’t move or talk until Benson patted his shoulder. Benson looked at him concernedly, “Anything want to talk to me? You are very upset.”

“Mincoff ruined four geniuses of our field, literally, our field. They should be members of us in the future,” Dr. Wong shook his head in grief, “Imagine how great they would be if they join us, but their career life was terminated at their twenties. One died, one will go to prison, and the other two quitted.”

Benson took a deep sigh, “Mincoff died, but they are still suffering. The crime was stopped, but the influence was still on. It’s impossible to eliminate the effects completely.”

“Hell is other people.” Answered Dr. Wong. After a short silence, he said to Benson, “Lieutenant, may I have a word with Miss Bishop? Scholar to scholar.”

“Of course,” Benson nodded, “Fin can go with you.”

Dr. Wong closed his eyes, “Just give me a few minutes to…” He sighed.

 

**[////]**

Carisi walked around in the room, feeling restless and irritable, like a wild beast trapped in a cage. As soon as Barba came in, Carisi snarled, “I loved someone I should HATE!” He yelled the words again.

Barba closed the door, then sat in the couch and looked at him peacefully, “Sit down.” He patted the seat next to him.

Carisi sat on the couch, then turned to him, grounding his teeth. Then he drowned in overwhelming misery, his voice became husky, “God, I choked her! I can’t believe I choked her!” His mind was blank and his heart was numb because of the agony. All he could remember was that he chocked Evelyn in the interrogation room. He was always in good control of himself even interrogating the worst criminals. But when facing Evelyn, he let his dark side out.

“That’s her purpose, to bring people’s dark side to the surface.” Barba tried to comfort him.

“And I just walked into her trap.” Carisi snorted, “God, I am…”

“Life with no parole.” Barba cut off his word, “the deal, life with no parole.”

Carisi froze, then frowned, “Why? Are you going to accept the deal?” Carisi raised his voice, “No, don’t tell me Stone convince you. Insanity defense will work, right?”

“Yes.” Barba raised his eyebrows, “You sound like a lawyer.”

“Don't screw around with me now!” Carisi looked restless, "I know it's her fault, but we all know she should not take the full responsibility."

“Then who should?” Barba looked at him, calmly, "Don't blame yourself. It's not your fault. And you do know you two can't be together after this, right?"

“I know! We are so over!” Carisi hissed. Then he bow his head and took a deep breath, "But it's not about us, it's about her. I can't let her pay for her whole life! She has suffered enough! She should have future! She should have her own life!"

“Suffered enough? Yes. The future? No." answered Barba, coldly, "She’s too dangerous..."

“That's why you accept the deal?” Carisi nodded, “You are afraid she would kill me.”

Barba didn’t answer.

“I don't need you protection, Rafi. I am a cop, I protect people! I am dealing with the criminals all the time. I am not afraid of any death threat.” said Carisi, shaking his head.

“But I am afraid to lose you, Sonny. You are my friend and I concerned you.” Barba sighed.

“And like you, I concerned her. I know it's stupid to say love right now, but I do care about her. I intentionally ignored all her abnormal signs. I am too afraid to lose her, I just want to keep her around me. I am too selfish. If I did something, she wouldn’t have done so many horrible things. I am not a good boyfriend, not even a good cop." Carisi shook his head, “But I swore to God that I would to protect her to the last moment. Rafi, please, do something. Don't ruin her, she need to be saved.”

“You save her, then who saves you? I am sorry, Detective Carisi, you've missed the chance already. Everyone should pay for their own fault, including you. I’ll accept the deal,” said Barba without hesitation, “I am here to inform you, not to ask you. I’m her lawyer, not you. End of discussion.”

“Her life will be over.” Carisi felt a pure grief in his deep heart.

Barba answered, “She never had a so called ‘life’. But I think I can get her in solitary confinement which is good for her, and also, this is the last thing we can do for her.”

Barba paused for a few second, watching Carisi, frowned, “Is she pregnant?” Barba didn’t know why he asked such weird question which was just like on his lips, of course, it was the easiest way to get solitary confinement.

Barba was surprised to find that Carisi didn’t show too much shock or panic, he just seemed a little disturbing, then shook his head, answered, “I don’t know.”

“Are you ready for…Oh…” Barba knew, then he nodded, “She was the one?”

“She was everything to me.” Answered Carisi, bitterly.

Barba shook his head and narrowed his eyes. His voice became tender, “You did love her.”

“I even bought a ring.” Carisi hung his head.

Barba sighed, “Oh, Sonny, you are such an idiot…”

 

**[////]**

Their conversation was cut off by Dr. Wong’s scream from interrogation room, Dr. Wong was shouting out Evelyn’s name.

Carisi’s heart sunk, then bounced wildly. He jumped from the couch and rushed out. He heard Benson demanded, “I thought you guys searched her!”

Fin answered, “We did.”

When he ran into the interrogation room, Rollins and Benson tried to drag him back. But he got out of their hands. Then he saw Evelyn was laying on the ground.

Stone smelt a little almond, he couldn’t help quivering, “Oh, God! It’s cyanide.” He stroke Evelyn’s hair again and again, tears was welling in his eyes, “God, Eve.”

The blood surged to Carisi’s head and a thumping noise was in his ears. His legs were trembling, dropping to his knees at her side. “Eve.” Carisi murmured, then bent over to hold her. Carisi reached out his shaking hand to feel Evelyn’s pulse. It stopped. Carisi’s heart froze out, then he felt an awful pain which was tearing him apart. He clasped Evelyn, kissed her forehead and touched her face, sobbing wildly, “Eve, please! Please wake up! Please, baby, I am so sorry. God, please wake up, please baby, don’t leave me…”

Carisi didn’t know how he was separated from Evelyn. Actually, he didn’t remember anything happened next. All his memory was hazy until he stood in M.E. office. Through the glass, Carisi could see Evelyn was laying on the operation bench covered by a white sheet. He had seen this many times before, but never expect to see someone he had so much bond with.

M.E. came out. She said to Benson, “KCN, she implanted a plastic minion in her cheek. Old fashioned, but it worked. Fifty times of lethal dose. She died in less than 2 minutes. I think she knew the dose she took wouldn’t speed the death process, but…”

“She just made sure she couldn’t be rescued.” Benson shook her head, “She had prepared for this.”

“I’ll summit the report later.” Said M.E., then her eyes rested on Carisi, “Detective Carisi, if you are ready?”

“Can I go in there?” Answered Carisi, he was trying to covered his tears in his eyes, but his hands are too tremble too much for that.

M.E. nodded and answered lightly, “Of course, I have something to tell you.”

Carisi walked into the room. M.E. lifted the sheet. Evelyn lay upon her back, her face was tranquil and pale, like falling asleep. Carisi couldn’t believe Evelyn had gone, there must be something goes wrong, it couldn’t be real. He saw her like that before. In the hospital attack, she looked exactly as right now, she was got shot and just need a surgery. Last night, she laid in the lab like this, pretending passing out, and was ready to kill him in the next minute. She would wake up, she should have woken up. Carisi had a ridiculous thought that since he was Evelyn’s target, he’s still alive, how could she be willing to die? She had been through so much difficult time in her whole life, how would she commit suicide right now?”

“Detective Carisi,” said M.E., she sighed, “We found HCG in her blood…”

“Oh, my God.” Carisi’s heart was seized by a sudden pang, then trembling from head to foot.

“I feel so sorry for that, Sonny, I’ll leave you alone.” said M.E., lightly.

Carisi buried himself into a deep sorrow and regret. He touched Evelyn’s forehead again and again, sobbing quietly, “I am so sorry, Eve, Please forgive me. Come back, don’t leave me.”

Evelyn’s forehead was as cold as ice, Carisi stifled a little chocking behind his hand. He thought of many endings of Evelyn, of them. He thought they may involve with each other for the whole of life because of what he did to her, but Evelyn’s death never entered his mind, “I am sorry, Eve, I am so sorry. Please forgive me. God, I am so sorry.” He said “sorry” for thousands of times and was willing to pay for his whole life, but he knew he would never wait for her answer.

Tears rolling down his face. How did he let things go so far? She was alive an hour ago, but now, she became a cold body. She suffered the interrogation in the past ten hours and told everything about herself to him, but now, she left him forever. Carisi couldn't believe that their last goodbye to each other was through hatred and resentment in the interrogation room. He never got the chance to soothe her when she was hurt, but when he was finally able to do it, she can't feel anything at all. She never opened her mind to him, but when they were finally honest with each other, she turned away forever. He had so many things undone and so much word unspoken. But in the end, he left her alone in despair at her last moment.

Carisi bent down, kissed her forehead softly and looked closely at her. She laid so still and peace- looking, like everything went back to where it started. Only this time, she wouldn't wake up any more.

 

**[///]**

“She shouldn’t end in this way.” Benson shook her head, feeling a little bitter, “She's only 26. She had a promising future. God, she had Carisi. She would have had a family, a real family…”

Dr. Wong felt pathetic and kind of hilarious, “You know what? She planned this.”

“What?”

“Her death would be the last straw to Detective Carisi, the fatal one. She is the best of us. Only death can be eternity. No one and nothing can change that kind of relationship with Detective Carisi.” Dr. Wong took a deep sighed, “He would never get over with this. Anyone would never get over with this.”

“Is there any meaning of this?” Stone said in a grief, “At the cost of her life?”

Dr. Wong answered, peacefully, “People’s mind is the most dangerous battle field in this world. A person challenges another, one heart conquers another one’s heart. We will never know who the winner is.”

Carisi scrambled to the door. Barba held his arms and steadied him as soon as he came out. Carisi was staring with empty eyes, murmured, “I lost her.” Then he turned to Barba and got the final answer, “Rafi, I lost everything.”

 

**Final Chapter: Redemption**

 

The door of squad dorm was open, Carisi hid the things on his hand quickly, then looked up. It's Stone, Carisi said hi to him unnaturally.

Stone stepped in and smiled, “I know what they mean. You smell…”

“Terrible?”

“No,” Stone frowned, “Weird. How long have you lived here?”

Carisi didn’t answered.

Stone sighed, “I guess since...anyway, you shouldn’t be here for so long.”

“I know.” Said Carisi, carelessly, “I just don’t want to go home.”

Stone sat next to him and put Carisi’s clothes away. Then he found what Carisi hid. It's the Evelyn's case file. Then there were several her photos sliding out from under the file. Stone took up the photos which must be taken when she and Carisi were together. Stone watched for a while, “I miss her, too.”

Carisi lost in memories, “Sometimes, she came to my apartment to sleep over. If I was back to home late, she always waited for me on the couch. She fell asleep occasionally, her glasses was askew and books dropped on the ground. But I know the light was always on for me when she was home. I just don’t want go back to face the dark and empty room alone.” Carisi buried his face in his hands, “I can’t believe all she did was to fool me. She was even carrying my baby when she...How could she do this to me?”

Stone watched Carisi and said in a sorrowful tone, “I've read the report, but the baby is less than two weeks, she was in a great pressure and dread for a long time, I don’t think she knew.” Carisi sighed, “I feel so sorry, Carisi. I really wish I can do something for you."

He took out something from the pocket, then said, "The CSU turned her apartment upside down, the crime lab gave this to me. I think it belongs to you."

It's a necklace with a cat-shape locket.

Stone said, "The CSU said it was found in a small box locked in a drawer of the closet. I guess she valued it."

Carisi answered, “It's her birthday gift. I gave it to her. She didn't often wear it because she was afraid that the necklace might be accidentally corroded by the chemicals in the lab.” He took up the necklace which seem to grimmer before his eyes. He remembered her birthday night. It's the most beautiful moment in his life when they danced together on the street in the late fall.

Stone tried to make him feel better, “The CSU still didn't find the diary about you. Maybe she didn’t write…”

“That’s not her MO.” answered Carisi, then clutched the necklace in his hand. After a short silence, he said, “I should let it go. As the shrink said. The diary is not important. Maybe it's just her mental trap. What she said and did are…”

“Detective Carisi’s Mode. Great!” Stone cut him off and nodded, “Why don’t we talk about your first day of field work, you know, after one week suspension and 20 days desk duty. How is that feel?”

Carisi raised his eyebrows, “That’s why you come? Thanks to her confession, the IAB considered me as the victim. I can still keep my badge and be a cop, catch bad guys...”

"You know what I am talking about." Stone shook his head, “I heard you are overprotect the victim. You punched the suspect.”

“The victim was only 10 years old and was sexually assaulted,” said Carisi, furiously, “When I found her, she was trembling and unable to cry. She need protection! She was traumatized! You know how difficult for a little girl to…”

“Are you talking about our victim…or Evelyn?” Asked Stone, suddenly.

Carisi stopped, then hung his head. His voice was a little chocking, “I always thought…if I can go to the past…I could help her when she was a little girl. I can protect her from the pain she would have to put up with.”

“Then her life would be different.” Stone looked away and tried to conceal the pain in his eyes.

Carisi nodded, “She would grow up safely, become Dr. Bishop, meet a guy and build a family.” “And you may never meet her again.” Stone looked at him, sadness was pouring out.

“But she will live happily ever after.” Carisi smiled, but his eyes were full of sorrow and regret.

Stone thought for a while, sighed lightly, “You do realize that you’ve already took the time machine to save our victim at her 10? This will change her life forever.”

Carisi looked up at Stone, his eyes was lighting up, “Yes,” Carisi nodded firmly, “that’s what I am fighting for.”

“That’s what we are fighting for,” Stone patted his shoulder, “you are not alone.”

“Thank you, Stone.” Carisi took a deep breath.

“Go home, you need a good rest,” Stone watched him concernedly, “I know it’s too early to start over. But everything has a start.”

Stone walked to the door, then he turned around, said seriously, "Hey, Detective Carisi, try to control yourself. Don't mess up at work."

Before Carisi responded, Stone continued, "Because...the victims need you, we need you and..." he paused, a thin smile came to his lips, "Eve need you, too."

The locket of the necklace was stinging his hand.

Carisi struggled to control his emotions, his eyes glistened with tears. He answered in a deep voice, "I know."

"Be my hero." That's her birthday wish.

 

**[////]**

When Carisi arrived home, it’s dark at night. He opened the door and turned on the light. The room became a land where familiar things were all different from those he had known. He stood there for a long time, at a loss. As far as his eyes could see, there were full of Evelyn’s traces like she just leaving or coming back very soon.

“Sonny!” Evelyn’s delightful voice sounded in his ears.

He looked up straight into the living room, then found it was empty. Carisi looked down and told himself not to be disappointed. He sank down the couch, feeling Evelyn was on the other side. Then he turned on the floor lamp and turned his head, there was a blanket piling up on the couch. He sighed.

He sat for a while, collected the books and paper from the ground and the table. These all belonged to Evelyn. He opened the books where Evelyn wrote a lot of notes. He ran his fingers over Evelyn’s handwriting, remembering the focusing look when she was studying. He stood up and took the books to his bookshelves. He didn’t want to put her things in a box and left them in a dark corner forever.

“Since you are always dealing with kids, the books about developmental psychology will be very helpful, ‘Uncle Sonny’.” Carisi heard Evelyn’s laugh, he smiled and looked around at where Evelyn used to read, but there was no one wearing his Fordham law school T-shirt and leaning against the book shelves.

Carisi lowered his eyes, then took several her clothes up from ground and walked into his bedroom. There were Evelyn’s photos on the cabinet. Next to the photo frame, the daisies were dry in the bottle.

“I love daisy.”

She lied to him about many things, except this one.

Carisi watched the photos. He recorded every beautiful moment of their life by camera. He said that he wished they would sit together to stroll down the memory when they were old. But she left him alone to remember her. Carisi put down the photos, took a deep breath and shook his head lightly, then walked toward to the closet. He opened it. Her coats were been mixed up with his. Carisi never doubt that she would be a great expert but need more practice to be a good wife. However, he was quite sure he would be a model husband since he was never tired of tidying up again after she’s done.

He took the coats out of the closet, a small drawer came into sight. Carisi always put some important things in it, like a gun, or a RING.

He frowned, hesitating, then opened the drawer lightly. The ring box was laying in there as the way he put, but there were some things extra. Next to the ring box, a daisy had already been brown and dry with a folded note beneath it. Carisi’s heart bounced.

“Last question, tell me Sonny, will you forget me?”

He took up the daisy, the petals fell softly down. Then he opened the note, it was Evelyn’s handwriting. He read it again and again, his hands started to shake and his heart began to cry. Then he clutched the note and daisy close to his chest, bursting into tears. At that moment, he knew all his love had been answered, all his misery had been redeemed and he was set free.

It was written:

**_I am sorry._ **

**_I love you._ **

She loved him as much as he loved her.

Someday in the future, he may forget her, but he would eventually find himself back.

_[The End]_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought this story would end up in 15000 word, 20000 tops, but it is 40000 words, Gosh.  
> It's really long story especially when English is my second language. There must be a lot of mistakes that I am not aware of.  
> I am sorry for any mistakes of grammar or words which bring you bad experience during reading.
> 
> Thank you for your reading.  
> Thank you for the kudos and subscribtions.  
> Every hit makes my writting day.
> 
> Hope you enjoy this story. Feel free to comment, I want to know your opinions. love you guys, xoxo.


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